chris wheelie's definitions

mohawk

Once, the punkest hairstyle on the planet, adapted and adopted from various native North Americans, including the Huron and Blood tribes. The originators of the mohawk style in punk circles were Wes Beech (of US band Plasmatics) and Rainy (of UK band Discharge). The punks went on to spike their mohawks with soap, eggwhite, glue and hairspray, as the Native Americans had with buffalo grease, before going into battle. A hairstyle which used to guarantee ridicule and abuse from braindead trendies. Since David Beckham's half-arsed style around 2000, the mohawk has become trendy and acceptable, so what's the point?

Now these trendy sheep think a mohawk's cool, I think I'll grow a comb-over instead.

by chris wheelie April 28, 2005

chod

Rubbish, lame, awful, atrocious.
(origin: South West England)

"I've got to quit, my job is complete chod"

by chris wheelie August 21, 2006

Poor Man's Custard

A term for white sauce, used in cookery. Also slang for sperm, due to its appearance and consistancy.

He drizzled the poor man's custard on to her chops.

by chris wheelie April 21, 2005

drippy tiddler

The consequence of having a weak willy. The condition which leads to damp patches at inopportune moments.

If it weren't for my drippy tiddler I'd wear beige trousers more often.

by chris wheelie April 28, 2005

Jiggered

An exclamation to use among quaint and polite circles, when really you mean buggered.

"Well, I'll be jiggered!" ejaculated Auntie Gladys, when Gracie won bingo the third time that day.

by chris wheelie April 28, 2005

Punk

A late 20th century phenomenum. The greatest, most earth-shaking popular culture since rock'n'roll. Musically, an natural evolution of folk/protest music. For the people, by the people, an accessable documentaion of modern times. Genuine eccentricity for the modern age, lampooning all trends before it and sticking two fingers up to a confused and plastic world.

The Bus Station Loonies.
Ruptured Ambitions.
Dick Lucas.
Vivian Stanshall.
Ian Dury.
John Peel.
Punk is punk is punk is punk.
There is no authority but yourself.
Do anything you wanna do.

by Chris Wheelie July 18, 2008

Bibby

A childish term for a hideous cherub or picture of a sickly-sweet baby or seraph. The sort that puts you off your meal.

"Yuch! I don't want to eat my sanwdwich in the Cistine Chapel, it's too full of Bibbies".

by chris wheelie April 21, 2005