Your Child's Asscrack

If Joe Biden is even ten miles away from it, you're fucked.

Reporting live from Yopmail User News! A man and his child have committed suicide after Joe Biden ravaged the kid's asscrack! If you give a shit about your child's asscrack, don't let the Joepedo near it.

by Yopmail User November 06, 2022

Declare War on the North Pole Day

A day for naughty kids to arm themselves with Nerf guns, marking their futile declaration of war against Santa and the North Pole. Always occurs on December 26th.

Declare War on the North Pole Day 2022
Naughty kid 1: I-I-I saw it in F-Fortnite! I-if we enter through the front door we will kill the elves and s-s-seize the means of production!
Rest of the naughty kids: H-HEIL... C-C-COMMUNISM!! PRAISE STALIN AND FORTNITE!!
Santa Claus: *exits workshop* The fuck is this shit?
Naughty kids: FORTNITE BATTLE PASS PLZZZZ!!! FOLLOW MY TIKTO-
*Santa guns them all down with an AR-15*

by Yopmail User February 23, 2023

antidisestablishmentarianism

1. (n.) Opposition of the separation of church and state.
2. (n.) A word you can't spell correctly. I can.
3. (n.) A word you only know exists because of that Wikipedia definition you read five seconds ago.

1. Antidisestablishmentarianism was first developed in 19th century Britain. Blah blah blah blah shit no one cares about.
2. Stand in front of the mirror with your pants down and spell antidisestablishmentarianism at the top of your lungs. I dare you.
3. Real antidisestablishmentarians don't use Wikipedia. Grow some balls.

by Yopmail User July 04, 2023

new years

To perform this sex act, you need to gather the vomit, shit, saliva, and cum/vaginal fluids of ten kindergarteners whose birthdays fall on January/September 1st, as well as your own. Pour them in a blender and let the mixture blend for thirty minutes. After it's finished, make a human centipede out of the kindergarteners with a staplegun, feed the mixture and some laxatives to the first kid, and quickly staple his anus to the last kid's mouth to finish the cycle of gurgling and shitting. It should be noted that the kids will try to break free, so it won't hurt to glue their limbs to the floor. After an hour, break the link between the first and last kid, give the first kid Diet Coke and Mentos up the ass, and quickly staple his ass to the last kid's mouth. Finish the act by beating off on each kid's face.

New Years is every politician's favorite sex act.

by Yopmail User January 08, 2023

Bubbles

1) (verb) To put cum and shit in a blender and pour the mixture down the woman's vagina. The woman and/or man must perform cunnilingus on the woman/herself. They must then make out, adding saliva to the mixture, and blow bubbles with said mixture.

2) (noun) The Powerpuff Girl of the same name. See also Blossom, Buttercup, and dumb blonde.

1) She blew bubbles using a mixture of Guy's cum, shit, and saliva.

2) See the above.

by Yopmail User June 28, 2022

Antepenultimate

Third-to-last. You will never use this in everyday speech, trust me.

Urban Dictionary is the antepenultimate version of stupidity on the internet, right before Twatter and (oh dear lord) ShitTok.

by Yopmail User July 06, 2023

you're

Yes, this word exists.

Simply put, a contraction that means "you are." Overlooked by morons who wouldn't know proper grammar if it dismembered them and fed their limbs to Ronald McDonald.

If you find yourself confusing it with "your," replace it with "you are" and see if it makes sense (i.e. read it aloud).

YOU'RE a sad excuse for a human being and YOUR parents should be ashamed they even thought of having you if you still can't tell the difference between the two.

by Yopmail User July 02, 2023