Yopmail User's definitions

Mc

McThe McThing McDonald's McPuts McAt McThe McBeginning McOf McEvery McOne McOf McTheir McProducts. McSounds McFucking McRetarded McIf McYou McAsk McMe.

Why the fuck does every McDonald's product have to begin with "Mc?" Are they not able to think of better, more creative names?

by Yopmail User August 23, 2022

Phallophronemohypnoglossovehomageiricoanatidaeobesoaphenphosmoneirophobophobia

The fear of the fear of getting a boner while thinking about being touched and watched by a fat duck while simultaneously sleeping, driving, publicly speaking, cooking, and dreaming.

How the fuck can I provide an example for phallophronemohypnoglossovehomageiricoanatidaeobesoaphenphosmoneirophobophobia when absolutely no one in the world has it?

by Yopmail User August 24, 2022

Fridge

To put on a condom, freeze your dick in a fridge, and anally and vaginally penetrate your girlfriend with the frozen condom on. To spice things up a bit, put some crushed ghost pepper in the condom and attempt to break the icy condom as you penetrate her.

I nearly rendered the both of us sterile after I spicily fridged my girlfriend.

by Yopmail User April 10, 2023

Sesame Street

While dressed up as Elmo, you slice someone's dick off while the both of you are masturbating and carry the severed dick to a preschool. Make sure you have a woman with you. In the preschool, you enter a classroom, interview the youngest child, and ask them vaguely sexual questions while keeping the severed dick a secret. When the child least expects it, you strip the woman naked, shove the severed dick in the woman's mouth in front of the child (and everyone else, for that matter), and use the blood from the severed penis to draw a dick on her boobs. You must then throw the severed dick in the teacher's mouth, assume control of her laptop, and play snuff films on the smartboard.

This definition of Sesame Street was sponsored by the letter D!

by Yopmail User August 14, 2022

Quizizz

Kahoot for poor people.

If nobody gives Quizizz Inc. a lecture on plagiarism, I'll do it myself!

by Yopmail User November 13, 2022

Printing Press

This sex act requires that you abduct three little girls and strip them naked in your basement. You must then break their knees with a sledgehammer, toss the girls aside, create a mixture of laxatives and your bodily fluids (especially cum and vomit), and let it blend for ten minutes. During these ten minutes, you are to stand a few meters from your desired girl, charge towards her, ram your cock (you can use a spiked dildo, albeit not necessary) up her ass (cunts and mouths are acceptable), and repeat for each girl until the blending finishes. Feed one of the girls your concoction and, with a staple gun, connect the girls' mouths to each other's asses so that they form an endless human centipede. After some time, collect some of their shit and use it to spell out a phrase of your choice. Smear the shit on their faces afterwards and beat off on their backs and faces.

Vomit on a printing press for bonus points.

by Yopmail User August 27, 2023

Reddit

A sex act in which the man must shove a large bottle of Diet Coke up his ass (the cap facing outward), open it, drop Mentos in it, and quickly position the bottle so that the opening is inside of the girl's vagina. If the bottle is positioned correctly, this will cause Diet Coke and Mentos to rush to every corner of her reproductive system, which will be destroyed as a result, resulting in severe pain. The man will then yell statements Redditors deem "holy," such as "FORTNITE IS HITLER AND MINECRAFT IS JESUS AND ANYONE WHO SAYS OTHERWISE IS A NAZI!!!" Using the girl's boobs as a canvas, the man must draw a Snoo while using her vaginal fluids as fingerpaint. Shitting in the girl's mouth afterwards optional.

Jill woke up in severe pain the next morning after being given a Reddit by her boyfriend, Jim.

by Yopmail User July 10, 2022