ThunderMummy's definitions

Annapolis

Capital of Maryland. Has many cool attributes despite most of its inhabitants. Many of the people are move ins who have decided that the city should be the model for Stepford wives everywhere. Had a cool working town flavor that is now virtually gone (The Little Campus was replaced by a fucking Irish Bar). Speaking of fucking Irish bars, every vomit reaked doorfront that charges $6 a Harp and thinks it is above Natty Bo calls itself an Irish Bar. They put O' or Mc or OAK in their name and get every 1/32 Irish blood and up motherfucker to pat themselves on the back for coming from someplace else. It is so obnoxious even Bostonians say "dude, too much". Full of fat fucking tourist who fill up the sidewalk as they ooh and aah at the overpriced cheesy nautical shit in the windows or stare at the Laura Ashley window that they could stare at back home. The food is 2/3 shitty as most involves $8 hamburgers, greasy crabcackes with non-Maryland crabmeat, and spoiled shellfish. Used to be cool but now full of pricks with lots of money but no class.

Did you hear, Annapolis just plowed under their last green space to put in a housing tract of McMansions. It is going to be called "Annapolis Greens"

by ThunderMummy November 3, 2005

penny method

Form of birth control in which it is okay to have sex as long as the woman squeezes a penny between her knees.

My parents used the penny method, I have thirteen brothers and sisters.

by ThunderMummy November 11, 2005

Princeton

Ivy League school that has inflated opinion of itself. Expensive investment as a hope for for success

#1 "My senior thesis at Princeton concerned Hegel and his..."
#2 "Dude, just shut the fuck up and give me my pizza"

by ThunderMummy November 11, 2005

gurgle jerk

One of the many names from an early Dave Letterman skit called "Name your baby when you're angry". Includes the names Crib Lizard and Mr. Drips. Can be used in place of the word baby.

Let's get out of the house before the missus sticks us with the gurgle jerk.

by ThunderMummy November 5, 2005

wisconsin

Was like Czechoslovakia, that is before communism came to an end, and is now worse. Has nice parts but suffers from childish inferiority complex to Illinois. That is silly, because while Chicago is a fine town, the rest of Illinois is a wasteland.

Hey, it's Wisconsin. It like going to Czechoslovakia, we'll zip in we'll zip out.

by ThunderMummy July 26, 2008

starbucks

Pure example of the power of marketing to people devoid of critical and independent thinking. Coffee chain whose business model is "what if we franchised the Death Star?" and sells millions of cups of coffee a year that tastes like it was brewed through the assholes of musty cadavers. Usually seen being consumed by soccer moms, overprivileged teenagers, and prissy douche bags who move into already gentrified urban heighborhoods but consider themselves edgy and courageous for living in the city. Just like you can get an elephant to fly if you strap a big enough jet engine on its back, Starbucks sells a shitload of coffee by forcing the idea that coffee should be expensive, shitty, and logoed to the above mentioned people.

I used to drink coffee for 60 cents a cup at my favorite diner but it was torn down to put in a Starbucks. If I wanted to drink that shit I'd microwave some rat turds in vinegar.

by ThunderMummy December 28, 2005

irish

People who are prone to tell you how great they are. Fond of touting their robust economy while failing to mention it was built on the foundation of an E.U. welfare state. Think everything Celtic is romantic, special, unique blah blah blah. Sometimes consider the Scotch and Welsh as Celtic kinsman and sometimes exclude them for not not being true Celts (as if Ireland has the only claim). Say they have their own language but unlike Wales, no one can actually speak it and haven;t for years (That makes them posseurs). Their beer is overrated (Beamish is really good, but doesn't have Guiness' marketing) food sucks (this ain't no France) and sometimes call themselves the blacks of Europe (this is especially offensive, yes they were oppressed but is this the equivalent of enslavement? Only a douchebag Irishman would think so). Do have a good history of music (the folk shit gets old but they can boast of Van Morrison, U2, Thin Lizzie etc.) The one factor that redeems the Irish? They can shit in a bag, stamp made in Ireland on it, and sell it to stupid Americans for $50.

Irish-American wannabe: Kiss Me I'm Irish
Irishman: Where you from?
IAW: Boston, Red Sox Rule!
Irishman: (shitting in a bag) Would you like to buy an authentic Irish souvenir?

by ThunderMummy December 28, 2005