Telephony's definitions

organic suspension of female bovine mammary compound

Plain and simple: milk.
Cow's milk is a liquid organic suspension that comes from a female cow's boobs.

Harry, can you please pick up a jug of organic suspension of female bovine mammary compound on your way home dear?

by Telephony April 12, 2015

battery hog

Another term for, "dry cell pig" -- that is, a battery-operated device that devours batteries like there's no tomorrow.

Man this radio is a real battery hog! I just put a new set of AA cells in there half an hour ago and they're already going down the tube!

by Telephony October 8, 2018

uronium

Chemical symbol: Un.
Atomic number 327.
An odoriferous brown substance that usually exists between the toliet seat hinges and the bowl.
Uronium may also appear around the bolts that hold the toliet to the floor.

Some people choose to ignore uronium; choosing instead to mask its unique odor with Glade® Plug-Ins® or Wizard™ aerosol.

by Telephony October 24, 2010

ass mallet

Another term for an asshole.

{Seen on a drone aerial video on YouTube}:

While I was flying the drone, I "heard" a jingle for Bob's Discount Furniture but with altered lyrics.
To wit:

♪ Bob's Bob-O-Pedics ♪
♪ From your βµṁ#Ø£€** to your ṕ€nµs

♪ Some ass mallet pee'd on a fembot!!! ♪
{~850ms pause}
♪ Bob's Bob-O-Pedics! ♪

by Telephony September 17, 2021

sweatheart

An unfortunate, but common misspelling of the word, "sweetheart".

{instant message conversation}

{Troy}: Good morning sweatheart!

{Lucy} Sweatheart? That's so fucking gross! Fuck you and the horse that rode you in!!! Goodbye asshole, I never want to see you again!

by Telephony January 27, 2018

dick medication

What some people call, "dick medication" -- that is, drugs like Viagra, Cialis, Levitra, etc. designed to give men with perpetually limp dicks the ability to get a boner.

{Stan}: Hey George, don't forget to take some dick medication to work with you. Chug one of those bitches down when you leave

so that you can cornhole me when you get home.
{George}: Alright, got 'em in my pocket. Love ya Stan!

by Telephony February 25, 2017

pee'd

A very common misspelling of the word, "peed" .

Josh had to go so badly, he simply pee'd behind a parked UPS truck.

by Telephony February 21, 2022