QuacksO's definitions

Maasaiah

A fiercely-devout tribe of war-like African Natives who went around slaughtering anyone who didn't convert to their religion.

I've always observed that mainstream religion has a horrific amount of fighting and killing associated with it, and the Maasaiah tribe's behavior proves it.

by QuacksO December 9, 2018

accusstomed

Familiar with strong language.

In the space-invaders film "Signs", former Episcopal priest Graham Hess has a hard time wrapping his head around the idea of yelling profanity while trying to rid his property of prowlers, since he was not accusstomed to speaking that way.

by QuacksO May 25, 2019

stumble-splutter

Where you make a loud burbling sound with your lips as you trip and go sprawling; this can help you to better focus your mind to hopefully not get hurt or damage anything in your fall, plus it will not overly alarm others in your general vicinity.

Petite slight-figured cutie: I totally love my new heart-throb like you wouldn't imagine; I just get concerned whenever we try to go for walks together across uneven ground like a lumpy grass-field, since he is not very sure-footed or steady-balanced in these terrains, plus he's much taller and bulkier than I am, and so I cannot safely/effectively try to catch him if he starts to topple over. He's usually able to land without injury if he has plenty of space to flail his arms and break his fall on the way down, though; I have therefore learned to just jump back out of the way whenever he makes a stumble-splutter, and so usually he merely thuds heavily without incident, and then simply clambers back up and takes my hand again to stroll on as if nothing happened.

by QuacksO August 17, 2018

"Newhart" genitals-introduction

Da way a dude humorously familiarizes you wif da three different "members" of his guy-junk --- "This is Larry; this is his brother Darryl, and this is his OTHER brother Darryl."

Ladies say dat they want a man who is "kind, caring, intelligent, and funny". Well, if your new guy-friend performs a "Newhart" genitals-introduction prior to first having sex wif you, it may not say much about his kindness or caring, but it sure-as-shootin' shows dat he has da intelligence and sense-of-humor portions of his personality down pat!.

by QuacksO June 22, 2020

hexcise tax

Da tariff dat you hadda pay da town government of colonial Salem, Massachusetts to keep dem from having da local witches put a curse on you.

Perhaps if they had simply abolished da hexcise tax in Salem, Massachusetts, the witch-trials would never have happened.

by QuacksO October 4, 2019

I reckon I can peace the story together

What Columbo would say if he was asked to collect da testimony of irate 'n' bickering witnesses who would need to be verbally placified and encouraged to get along wif each other so dat they could all speak coherently while relating to said famous detective what they saw.

What with Columbo's inherently calm and unassuming manner, he put people at ease, and so if he said, "I reckon I can peace the story together" during an investigation, you could generally count on his being able to do so.

by QuacksO October 11, 2024

cardiac arrest

Refers to an instance where you get "cuffed 'n' booked" for stealing someone's heart.

Cardiac arrest never happens in real life, of course, but "there oughtta be a law" against trifling with someone's affections.

by QuacksO October 5, 2018