4 definitions by Oliver Faltz

adj. Dominated by one's television system.
Just like henpecked, except it's your television that rules your life. There are degrees of aspect, expressed as a ratio, e.g. 4:3, 16:9.
Ever since Harve got that big TV with all the little speakers, he never goes out anywhere. He's waayy aspect, like 23:7.
by Oliver Faltz August 7, 2009
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A secretary who handles a celebrity's twitter account. Some celebrities can't be bothered to tweet for themselves.
"OMG, I just got a tweet from that chick who went crazy on Meal Or No Meal! She's gonna be on Dancing With The Biggest Losers!"

"No way, dude. She has a twitterary handle that. She doesn't do her own tweets."

"A twitterary?"

"Oh, yeah, you've been breathless over the tweets of some underling!"
by Oliver Faltz November 28, 2009
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tectonic, noun
a gin drink for your office's alpha geek after work.
Cyrus: Hey, thanks a lot for getting my computer to speak English again, and showing me how to use Twitter. Here, go have a tectonic on me.

Bruce: This is the most sensible problem I've handled all day. I had two people who had plugged the power strip into itself. I sure need a tectonic or two after a day like this.
by Oliver Faltz March 29, 2013
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Unlike a baker's dozen, which is 13, the fisherman's tendency to boast and lie means the fisherman's dozen is 9 fish.

Similarly, the fisherman's foot is a fish that isn't really a foot long, even after the fisherman steps on it.
"Yo, Cyrus, how'd you do out there? You fool any big ones?"

"Eh, not bad, Lem. I caught a dozen, and four of 'em were over a foot long!"

"Tell me, lad, do you mean a fisherman's dozen, and a fisherman's foot long?"

"You saw right through me, Lem, but they'll fry up nice."
by Oliver Faltz December 19, 2011
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