ORD Ellis's definitions
An ailment of unknown origin considered to be 'virtually' viral that can affect wide cross-sections of any population predominantly with Internet capability. However, more seriously infecting those most susceptible i.e. those who: are anal retentive; have no other life; have too much time on their hands; are infirm; are agoraphobes; possess other such vulnerabilites.
The most obvious symptoms - other than the outwardly addictive behaviour more readily observed by others - is an abnormal growth spanning all (or at least a majority) of the fingertips called a 'keyboard'. Milder forms of the illness can manifest itself in the form of a growth called a 'mouse' usually isolated and attached to only one hand. This form of the disease swiftly grows into the full-blown version quite rapidly exhibiting the keyboard style growth, sometimes nearly instantaneously.
Cure for the disease is not as simple to accomplish as it may at first sound. Invasive proceedures such as surgical removal of the keyboard growth and/or unplugging of the computer seem only to be temporary fixes as in most cases the computer becomes mysteriously 're-plugged' and the keyboard growth rapidly reappears on the victims' fingertips once more. No matter how often these proceedures are followed, the incidence of re-occurance remains alarmingly high, almost 100%.
It is currently classified as a Social Disease, but actually that is a misnomer as it is more of an ANTI-Social Disease as real world relationships suffer while the 'virtual' relationships propogate.
Currently, there is no surefire cure and the outlook for one in the near future is dim.
The most obvious symptoms - other than the outwardly addictive behaviour more readily observed by others - is an abnormal growth spanning all (or at least a majority) of the fingertips called a 'keyboard'. Milder forms of the illness can manifest itself in the form of a growth called a 'mouse' usually isolated and attached to only one hand. This form of the disease swiftly grows into the full-blown version quite rapidly exhibiting the keyboard style growth, sometimes nearly instantaneously.
Cure for the disease is not as simple to accomplish as it may at first sound. Invasive proceedures such as surgical removal of the keyboard growth and/or unplugging of the computer seem only to be temporary fixes as in most cases the computer becomes mysteriously 're-plugged' and the keyboard growth rapidly reappears on the victims' fingertips once more. No matter how often these proceedures are followed, the incidence of re-occurance remains alarmingly high, almost 100%.
It is currently classified as a Social Disease, but actually that is a misnomer as it is more of an ANTI-Social Disease as real world relationships suffer while the 'virtual' relationships propogate.
Currently, there is no surefire cure and the outlook for one in the near future is dim.
She has this incurable condition. She never wants to spend time with the family or cleaning the house anymore. And our sex life is virtually non-existant. All her time is spent posting and replying in nearly a half-dozen forums all over the net. I can't wait for someone to come up with a cure for POSTITIS SYNDROME.
by ORD Ellis March 25, 2007
Get the Postitis Syndromemug. Self defecation is the act of being able to make fun and/or light of yourself in an effort toward 'humanizing' yourself. Actually that is the definition of 'self deprecation' however self defecation is self deprecation BUT to the 'Nth' degree. To further explain, the antonym of being self deprecative would be 'pompous' while the antonym of being self defecative would be that of a 'complete pompous ass'.
He was trying too hard to fit in by using some self defecation humour and ended up making himself not only the butt of his own jokes, but everyone else's as well. What a complete ass, he sure went overboard.
by ORD ELLIS September 15, 2007
Get the self defecationmug.