Mike in Aurora, Colorado's definitions

Oyster in a Half Shell

Normally, Oyster in a Half Shell is taken to mean a food dish. However, the extended and additional definition of that expression leads to that of the sexual nature. Now, it is also a phrase that denotes when a male ejaculates onto, or, into a woman's palm after she causes such an incident to occur after performing digital sex, or more commonly known as a hand job. Although it is basically understood that this refers to the same regarding prostitution, many non-professional women, married and unmarried, call it the same thing. Boasting by men about the act often occurs, somewhat like a badge of recognition, et al.,.

Hooker After Satisfying a Client: "Wow! He howled when I jerked him off and I ended up with an 'oyster in a half shell'!"

A Conferring Couple After Intercourse: "I loved it, dear! Your 'oyster in a half shell' was great!!" said Linda.

Man Who is a Legend in his Own Mind: "Yeah, I'm the man! Just did that girl. She then rubbed me off. Talk about 'oyster in a half shell'! There was so much cum that she's thinking about suing me because it slid off the sides of her hands and onto her expensive carpet!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado May 21, 2008

Popped Lid

1.) In direct reference to the loss of a dental filling during, and as a result of, oral sex, almost in conjuction with fellatio, (oral and penial contact). 2.) Can also be used to describe a bad relationship, whether sexual or plutonic in nature. 3.) May also be used to describe something, or anything, that is negative.

Head Banging: "She went to town on me! Unfortunately, I had to comfort her while driving her to an all night dentist! We couldn't tell him that I was so wild in her mouth that it caused a 'popped lid'!"

Break Up: "I had to end it with Linda. Going out with her was a 'popped lid'!"

Parental Child Conflict: "Man! My mom is so freaked about the rave I wanted to go to that she acted so 'popped lid' about it all."

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado March 22, 2008

Buck Buck Buck

1. A term used in reference to a person who simply doesn't stop pontificating/talking. Usually the 'superpower' during a conversation. Someone who never runs out of material regardless of life situations for they do not stop talking! 2. A yappy little dog that resembles the features described in definition 1. Normally in the Terrier class of canine, but can just be a dog that, not unlike a human 'Buck Buck Buck', seemingly will not cease barking. 3. A political 'talking head' that promises things to no end in sight, however, more often than not, results in very little positive outcomes, though not always!

Cell phone patron: "She gets on the phone, girl, and is a real 'Buck Buck Buck'! Cannot keep her trap shut!!"

Houseguest: "Stan is a nice guy, but he's been here for three days and is too much of a 'Buck Buck Buck'! He needs to leave!!"

Bar: "Man! Normally Dave is reserved, but get a couple of Jaggermeisters in him and he turns into a real 'Buck Buck Buck'! Chatterbox city!!" Said the bartender.

A neighbor: "That little white Westie terrier is cute as hell, but man, what a 'Buck Buck Buck'! Won't stop yapping until either the owner shuts him up or if someone jokes about getting him fixed! Cares about his 'arf balls' too much!!

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado February 7, 2008

Night Freak

Is when a person is involuntarily accosted sexually, normally in the form of oral sex, generally referred to when it is the female initiating the act while she is awake and her male target is asleep. Although the scenario thus described is the most common usage, it does have derivatives and alternative sexual encounters that relate to the same. 1.) When an awake female performs oral sex, or fellatio, on a male when he is asleep. 2.) Any sexual situation that is perpetuated by a waking party, or parties, as the sexual target is accosted. 3.) Having an orgasm during a 'night freak' session, whether awake or asleep, when climax occurs. It is often a reciprocal statement of the obvious.

After a female pulls such a stunt on a sleeping male: "Whoa! I couldn't believe that such a church going girl like Linda would pull a 'night freak' on me like that!"

When a guy awakes during a 'night freak' and cums: "Oh, God! I just 'night freaked', baby!"

A gay encounter: "I thought he was just dreamy and he shot out buckets and howled like a wolf when I did a 'night freak' on him! Whadda guy!!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado April 29, 2008

Bow Wow

1.) Refers to the sex act of doggie style or arf sex, where the male mounts the female from behind, normally vaginal contact, however, can also refer to anal sex in the same fashion. 2.) Having had good sex and boasting about the same, although it is not restricted in the sense of all within definition 1.). Can refer to almost any completed sex act.

Prostitute Query: "I charge the same for 'bow wow' as I would for missionary sex. Would you like that?"

Guy Talk: "We did it 'bow wow' for almost two hours, man!"

False Stud: "Yeah! Got her into 'bow wow' big time! I was good, dude!!" Said Andy, acting proud. However, Howard told Dilbert that it was not true because Sylvia never even saw Andy again. There was no way he could have had 'bow wow' with her, if anything.

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado February 24, 2008

Barakcracy

A very nuevo term, or, modern terminology, referring to Democratic Presidential Candidate, Barak Obama, and the White House Cabinet, if, and or, when, he wins the election in 2008. It is simply set to describe the probable outcome in the event of such and occurance.

A Xenophobic Republican Voter: "Man! If that dude gets into office, we'll end up with a 'Barakcracy'! That's for sure!!"

An anti-Bush Voter: "I'll tell you what! If that guy makes it to presidency, it will be a Barakcracy. That's a hell of a lot better than that stupid and unrealistic Bush Administraton!"

A Pessimistic Observer: "If we get a 'Barakcracy', then we are truly in trouble."

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado May 21, 2008

Splert

1. A descriptive term pertaining predominantly with male ejaculation, sometimes female, as well. 2. To describe a pending orgasm. 3. A term used announcing sexual intentions/wishes. 4. Used to describe a woman's period, or, 'time-of-the-month'. 5. Squeezing a liquid substance out of a squirt bottle or tube. 6. Used to give vague details of after birth when a woman produces a baby.

Sex completed: "Wow! I came and it really splert that time!"
Orgasm pending: "I'm gonna splert!" He said in passion.
Wanton desire: "Dude! I'd really like to splert her!"
Menstruation: "I used my last tampoon for my splert!"
Squirt bottle: "That ketchup came out in a splert."
Childbirth: "After she delivered, I had an intern clean up the splert on the floor!"

by Mike in Aurora, Colorado February 5, 2008