Mark H's definitions
*At the annual college swimming championship competition*
Chuck: Damn Sean, did you see that Erica outswim the other contestants for the umpteenth time? She just won the whole tourney and is the undefeated champion of the whole district! I wonder how the hell she does it.
Sean: Lotsa practice obviously. Like the other swimmers. But one could assume that it's in part due to those damn fine floatation devices she got on her! *points and ogles at Erica as she holds up her trophy to the audience*
Chuck: Amen, brother! I sure wanna make that one my little bed mermaid! Giggidy giggidy!
Mark H. UD contributer since February 2004.
Chuck: Damn Sean, did you see that Erica outswim the other contestants for the umpteenth time? She just won the whole tourney and is the undefeated champion of the whole district! I wonder how the hell she does it.
Sean: Lotsa practice obviously. Like the other swimmers. But one could assume that it's in part due to those damn fine floatation devices she got on her! *points and ogles at Erica as she holds up her trophy to the audience*
Chuck: Amen, brother! I sure wanna make that one my little bed mermaid! Giggidy giggidy!
Mark H. UD contributer since February 2004.
by Mark H April 24, 2005
Get the floatation devicesmug. 1. American beer sucks. Drinking that horse piss really makes me want to visit Europe.
2. When I saw George W. Bush's face with the caption "Person of the Year" above it on the recent issue of TIME Magazine, I had the irresistible urge to visit Europe all of a sudden.
3. While vacationing at the beach during Spring Break, I felt like visiting Europe when I saw that 95 percent of the girls there were fat and broke down, thus reminding me that McDonald's is succeeding in their scheme to make many Americans overweight.
Mark H. Since February 2004.
2. When I saw George W. Bush's face with the caption "Person of the Year" above it on the recent issue of TIME Magazine, I had the irresistible urge to visit Europe all of a sudden.
3. While vacationing at the beach during Spring Break, I felt like visiting Europe when I saw that 95 percent of the girls there were fat and broke down, thus reminding me that McDonald's is succeeding in their scheme to make many Americans overweight.
Mark H. Since February 2004.
by Mark H January 6, 2005
Get the visit Europemug. A Mexican man walks into a bar.
Please note that he's the *only* Mexican person there and all the other guys are white.
Suddenly one of the white guys walks up to the Mexican guy and says...
"Hey you! Colored men aren't allowed, much less welcome here!"
Then, the Mexican guy turns around and says to the white guy...
"Hey pendejo... When I was born, I was brown!"
"When I grew up, I was brown!"
"When I am sick, I'm brown!"
"When I'm in the sun, I'm brown!"
"When I'm in the cold, I'm brown!"
"And when I die, I'll still be brown!"
"But on the other hand you, pendejo, when you were born, you were pink!"
"When you grew up, you were white!"
"When you're sick, you turn yellow or even green!"
"When you're in the sun, you turn red!"
"When you're in the cold, you turn blue!"
"And when you die, you'll turn purple!"
"And you have the nerve and the balls to call me a "colored man!?" Ha ha!"
Please note that he's the *only* Mexican person there and all the other guys are white.
Suddenly one of the white guys walks up to the Mexican guy and says...
"Hey you! Colored men aren't allowed, much less welcome here!"
Then, the Mexican guy turns around and says to the white guy...
"Hey pendejo... When I was born, I was brown!"
"When I grew up, I was brown!"
"When I am sick, I'm brown!"
"When I'm in the sun, I'm brown!"
"When I'm in the cold, I'm brown!"
"And when I die, I'll still be brown!"
"But on the other hand you, pendejo, when you were born, you were pink!"
"When you grew up, you were white!"
"When you're sick, you turn yellow or even green!"
"When you're in the sun, you turn red!"
"When you're in the cold, you turn blue!"
"And when you die, you'll turn purple!"
"And you have the nerve and the balls to call me a "colored man!?" Ha ha!"
Pass it on...
(Note that I'm not racist. I'm Mexican myself. I just found this joke in some latino guy's myspace page and so since I thought it was pretty funny, I decided to translate it to English and post it here.)
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Mark H. Proud UD author since February 2004.
(Note that I'm not racist. I'm Mexican myself. I just found this joke in some latino guy's myspace page and so since I thought it was pretty funny, I decided to translate it to English and post it here.)
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Mark H. Proud UD author since February 2004.
by Mark H July 30, 2006
Get the Mexicanmug. Dayum brotha, that dank we chiefed up last night was straight up hazmat; shit it made me forget my social security number, my sexual orientation, and where to properly take a dump!
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Mark H. Contributing to the drug abuser's slang vocabulary since February 2004.
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Mark H. Contributing to the drug abuser's slang vocabulary since February 2004.
by Mark H October 14, 2006
Get the hazmatmug. A very good black/thrash metal band from Germany. Characterized especially by the wicked, raspy, German-accented vocals of their singer, Tom Angelripper.
by Mark H July 16, 2004
Get the Sodommug. To have very poor aim. This hyperbolic term is usually used to denote poor marksmanship or to have very poor aim in certain activities that involve throwing something(such as certain sports).
1. While we were out hunting, Mitch was a very poor shot and couldn't even hit the broad side of a barn, and so when he ran out of ammo, he ultimately got Roy Horn'ed by the deer he kept trying to shoot dead.
2. Damn, Mark is such a mark-ass pitcher! He can't even hit the broad side of a barn, let alone strike anyone out. His pitches make even Rafael Palmeiro's erectile dysfunction reach out for a glorious grand slam!
Mark H. On Urban Dictionary since February 2004.
2. Damn, Mark is such a mark-ass pitcher! He can't even hit the broad side of a barn, let alone strike anyone out. His pitches make even Rafael Palmeiro's erectile dysfunction reach out for a glorious grand slam!
Mark H. On Urban Dictionary since February 2004.
by Mark H March 1, 2005
Get the can't hit the broad side of a barnmug. While I was flying to Hawaii in the luxury jet, I happened to come across my girlfriend who was working as a flight attendant. During her break time, we both went to an area where there were no people sitting around and while we sat there unnoticed, she was giving me some amazing airhead.
Mark H. Urban Addict since February 2004
Mark H. Urban Addict since February 2004
by Mark H November 14, 2004
Get the airheadmug.