Mark H's definitions
(At the annual town chili festival)
Judge: "Alright Frank, we all know that you are a chili genious. You have made the best chili in town for two years already. No doubt that this will be your third year."
Frank: "Indeed sir, this is my latest recepie that I sure hope will make everyone's taste buds dance and sing! Go on, have a taste!"
Judge: *gets a spoon and tastes Frank's chili* *gags in disgust* "Why I am very sorry Frank, but this chili is utter dog shit."
Frank: "Whaaat!?"
Old Lady: "Hey you Frank, have you seen my Fido around here? He's a large Great Dane and I have had a history of trouble keeping him on my leash. I am very sure I saw him right here. In fact, I even saw him climb up onto your stove and take a crap in your chili while it was still cooking!"
Judge: *suddenly feels very sick and loses his dinner all over the ground*
Mark H. UrbanDictionary author since February 2004.
Judge: "Alright Frank, we all know that you are a chili genious. You have made the best chili in town for two years already. No doubt that this will be your third year."
Frank: "Indeed sir, this is my latest recepie that I sure hope will make everyone's taste buds dance and sing! Go on, have a taste!"
Judge: *gets a spoon and tastes Frank's chili* *gags in disgust* "Why I am very sorry Frank, but this chili is utter dog shit."
Frank: "Whaaat!?"
Old Lady: "Hey you Frank, have you seen my Fido around here? He's a large Great Dane and I have had a history of trouble keeping him on my leash. I am very sure I saw him right here. In fact, I even saw him climb up onto your stove and take a crap in your chili while it was still cooking!"
Judge: *suddenly feels very sick and loses his dinner all over the ground*
Mark H. UrbanDictionary author since February 2004.
by Mark H May 7, 2005
Get the dog shitmug. by Mark H March 15, 2004
Get the DOOAmug. After I gave her a boquet of flowers to show her my love, my girlfriend then let me lick, play with, and pollinate her flesh flower.
by Mark H September 19, 2004
Get the flesh flowermug. Degrading, but fitting name to call a sexually active woman who isn't very intelligent and who has the compulsive habit/desire to give men oral sex.
Your mom: "Mmmmmh, mmmmmh, mmmmmmm."
Plumber: "Ooo yeah! Polish my tool, bitch!"
Your mom: "Mmmmmmm."
Plumber: "Okay you can stop now. I'm gonna "fix your sink" now. *gets out condom and lubricant*"
Your mom: "Mmmmmh yeah, mmmmmh, mmmmmmm, mmmmmh, mmmmmh, mmmmmmmmmmm!"
Plumber: "I said STOP now, Cum Brains!"
Your mom: "Mmm, mmmmmmm?"
Plumber: "You've got a bad case of oral fixation you know."
Mark H. Proud UD author since February 2004.
Plumber: "Ooo yeah! Polish my tool, bitch!"
Your mom: "Mmmmmmm."
Plumber: "Okay you can stop now. I'm gonna "fix your sink" now. *gets out condom and lubricant*"
Your mom: "Mmmmmh yeah, mmmmmh, mmmmmmm, mmmmmh, mmmmmh, mmmmmmmmmmm!"
Plumber: "I said STOP now, Cum Brains!"
Your mom: "Mmm, mmmmmmm?"
Plumber: "You've got a bad case of oral fixation you know."
Mark H. Proud UD author since February 2004.
by Mark H August 21, 2005
Get the Cum Brainsmug. (can also be spelled "sarlaac")
The huge sand monster from the movie Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, that Jabba the Hutt tried to feed Han Solo and Luke Skywalker to. The creature is always stationary, lying in wait in its sand pit with its toothy lamprey-like mouth just sticking out, ready to swallow any careless human or animal that tumbles and slips down the sand pit. Tentacles surrounding the mouth grab whatever human or creature they sense nearby and then pull the helpless meal down the Sarlacc's maw. Once the person or creature is swallowed by the monster, he/she/it will undergo a new destination of pain and suffering as he/she/it is slowly digested over 1000 years.
The term "Sarlacc" can also be used to describe any vagina that has a wider diameter than the average diameter of any known vagina. Kinda like the female counterpart of a chode.
The huge sand monster from the movie Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, that Jabba the Hutt tried to feed Han Solo and Luke Skywalker to. The creature is always stationary, lying in wait in its sand pit with its toothy lamprey-like mouth just sticking out, ready to swallow any careless human or animal that tumbles and slips down the sand pit. Tentacles surrounding the mouth grab whatever human or creature they sense nearby and then pull the helpless meal down the Sarlacc's maw. Once the person or creature is swallowed by the monster, he/she/it will undergo a new destination of pain and suffering as he/she/it is slowly digested over 1000 years.
The term "Sarlacc" can also be used to describe any vagina that has a wider diameter than the average diameter of any known vagina. Kinda like the female counterpart of a chode.
1. If Satan was a woman, then her vagina would probably look like a Sarlacc monster.
2. When I was getting laid with my girlfriend, I realized that my penis couldn't fit in tightly because she had a Sarlacc. I could however, fit my whole hand into the wider-than-average vagina, therefore providing her with intense orgasming pleasure, as her G-spot was so goddamn easy to access.
2. When I was getting laid with my girlfriend, I realized that my penis couldn't fit in tightly because she had a Sarlacc. I could however, fit my whole hand into the wider-than-average vagina, therefore providing her with intense orgasming pleasure, as her G-spot was so goddamn easy to access.
by Mark H September 11, 2004
Get the sarlaccmug. 1. A famous German zeppelin which crashed in New Jersey back in 1937.
2. An extremely obese German person.
2. An extremely obese German person.
*Nick D and his homeboys are out vacationing in Munich, Germany during the Oktoberfest festival while they drink all the beer they want*
Nick D: Holy Shit y'all, run! Move out of the way because the Hindenburg is about to crash down over here!!!
*Nick D and his homies move out of the way as a very very fat man runs in between them and the crowd*
Nick D: Oh wait my bad y'all, that's just a morbidly overweight cheese hog who looks like he's trying to find the restroom. Must have the beer shits or something.
Nick D: Holy Shit y'all, run! Move out of the way because the Hindenburg is about to crash down over here!!!
*Nick D and his homies move out of the way as a very very fat man runs in between them and the crowd*
Nick D: Oh wait my bad y'all, that's just a morbidly overweight cheese hog who looks like he's trying to find the restroom. Must have the beer shits or something.
by Mark H September 22, 2004
Get the Hindenburgmug. The scene here is that of inside a strip joint during a "big event."
(Women are cheering as their favorite male stripper does his amazing seductive dance)
Male Stripper:(has just taken all of his clothes off when all of a sudden, he feels an intense bowel movement inside his belly)
Male Stripper: (shouting to the crowd of women) Sorry for the time out ladies, but I really need to go release the beast! I have a bad case of beer shits in here!! (tries to run to the restroom but he's too late)
Male Stripper: Aaah. Aaaah! Oh shit NO, there it goes!!
(Women in the crowd hurl humiliating and deriding comments and insults at the male stripper to express their disgust of what they just saw)
Male Stripper: Fuck.
And the moral of this little story is that if you are working as a male stripper, be sure to use the restroom and expel as much bodily waste as possible before the show. Oh and if you have diarrhea, please take a break from the job until you can shit normaly and less frequently.
Mark H. Adding more terms for the removal of fecal matter from your body to UrbanDictionary since February 2004.
(Women are cheering as their favorite male stripper does his amazing seductive dance)
Male Stripper:(has just taken all of his clothes off when all of a sudden, he feels an intense bowel movement inside his belly)
Male Stripper: (shouting to the crowd of women) Sorry for the time out ladies, but I really need to go release the beast! I have a bad case of beer shits in here!! (tries to run to the restroom but he's too late)
Male Stripper: Aaah. Aaaah! Oh shit NO, there it goes!!
(Women in the crowd hurl humiliating and deriding comments and insults at the male stripper to express their disgust of what they just saw)
Male Stripper: Fuck.
And the moral of this little story is that if you are working as a male stripper, be sure to use the restroom and expel as much bodily waste as possible before the show. Oh and if you have diarrhea, please take a break from the job until you can shit normaly and less frequently.
Mark H. Adding more terms for the removal of fecal matter from your body to UrbanDictionary since February 2004.
by Mark H October 21, 2004
Get the release the beastmug.