Kate Sjostrand's definitions

shy penis

Shy Penis is a term used to describe a general state of shock exhibited by one's penis in the presence of other men, most particularly when attempting to urinate.

Ted stands by the urinal and pops it out just as Ralph walks into the bathroom. Ted waits and waits and waits, but is unable to force the pee out.

Ralph: What's taking so long? I have to go!

Ted: Seem to have a slight case of shy penis.

by Kate Sjostrand April 2, 2008

postgame

after, subsequent, later than, or following after a game. It is a time marked by alcohol consumption, both in celebration and in depressive anxiety resulting from loss, depending upon which team you are on or support.

Ted: Man, that was one hell of a game. Did you see that pass?

Ralph: Yeah, I saw it. It'll be flashing behind my eyes for the remainder of postgame when I'm drowning my sorrow in suds.

by Kate Sjostrand April 5, 2008

GCE

GCE is an acronym for "gross conceptual error". Originating in the nuclear navy, the acronym is used to point out when someone's logic is severely flawed.

Ted: You'd think that the water out of the water softener would taste salty with as much salt as we add to soften it up.

Ralph: Dude, GCE. The salt doesn't go into the water, it replenishes sites on the ion exchanger!

by Kate Sjostrand February 19, 2008

RTSS

RTSS is an acronym for Reverse Telecommuting – Spousal Support (RTSS), and is defined as the execution of non-employment activities at one’s place of employment as directed (requested) by a spouse or significant other. RTSS can have an adverse effect on the mental well-being of participating males, leading to general aggravation and subsequent participation in a male bitch session.

Ted: Hey, you want to go grab a burger for lunch?

Ralph: Maybe, if I can finish this fuckin’ RTSS.

Ted: Man, that’s rough.

Ralph: Tell me about it. If I had known I’d be doing fucking taxes all day, I’d of just stayed home and sucked down a six.

by Kate Sjostrand April 15, 2008

swedish dildo

Another name for a double-sided dildo utilized when two bottom gay males have sex.

Ted: Hey, I was watchin some gay porn last night, and two bottoms were rammin asses with this weird thing in between them.

Ralph: Oh yeah? It was probably a swedish dildo.

by Kate Sjostrand April 1, 2008

recession

Recession is the decline in a country's gross domestic product (GDP), or negative real economic growth, for two or more successive quarters of a year. The term recession, however, has been utilized in recent decades by politicians to distort the economic outlook and reframe in more positive terms rather than have to address the looming economic depression.

Ralph: Dude, the feds just lowered interest rates and backed a takeover of a large investment bank after acknowledging that we might be in a recession.

Ted: This recession's been going on since Bush took over. How long until we call it an economic depression?

by Kate Sjostrand March 21, 2008

election result

The conclusion to the democratic process employed by various locals said to represent the will of the people. It is often achieved through a process known as counting, whereby a perceived majority claims victory over the perceived minority (please note that actual numbers are seldom referenced until they have been placed into the appropriate provisional ballot box where they are deemed as false votes and duly discarded until the desired result has been achieved).

Ted: Hey, did you hear that Obama won the election in New Mexico?

Ralph: Really? What was the election result?

Ted: All of the delegates went to Hillary.

by Kate Sjostrand February 14, 2008