30 definitions by Kate Sjostrand

First coined in the movie "Hot Shots!", it is a delicate corneal inversion procedure administered in the correction of walleye vision; however, due to the high risk of eye socket damage, it is normally carried out via the rectum.
Jim 'Wash Out' Pfaffenbach: I just got kicked out of the unit. My flight status has been withdrawn. I'm through, Dead Meat!

Pete 'Dead Meat' Thompson: What happened?

Jim 'Wash Out' Pfaffenbach: It's my eyes. I've got walleye-vision.

Pete 'Dead Meat' Thompson: Isn't there something that can be done?

Jim 'Wash Out' Pfaffenbach: Well, there's a delicate corneal inversion procedure... a multioptipupiloptomy. But, in order to keep from damaging the eye sockets, they've got to go in through the rectum. Ain't no man going to take that route with me!
by Kate Sjostrand February 21, 2008
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The expression "christmas came early" originated in northern New Mexico. In this case, "christmas" refers to the unique combination of both red chile and green chile on your breakfast burrito. The fiery blend has a unique chemical reaction that results in premature bowel movements that are tainted with the fire of the chile. Thus, when one has a BM after consuming a christmas breakfast burrito, christmas is said to have come early.
Ralph: Oh, man! It's only 10:00 am and that loaf I dropped felt like fire!

Ted: Sounds like christmas came early.
by Kate Sjostrand March 21, 2008
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GCE is an acronym for "gross conceptual error". Originating in the nuclear navy, the acronym is used to point out when someone's logic is severely flawed.
Ted: You'd think that the water out of the water softener would taste salty with as much salt as we add to soften it up.

Ralph: Dude, GCE. The salt doesn't go into the water, it replenishes sites on the ion exchanger!
by Kate Sjostrand February 19, 2008
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Shy Penis is a term used to describe a general state of shock exhibited by one's penis in the presence of other men, most particularly when attempting to urinate.
Ted stands by the urinal and pops it out just as Ralph walks into the bathroom. Ted waits and waits and waits, but is unable to force the pee out.

Ralph: What's taking so long? I have to go!

Ted: Seem to have a slight case of shy penis.
by Kate Sjostrand April 2, 2008
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The rapid loss of confidence in one's capabilities from one's traditionally supportive network of friends, customers, etc.
Ralph: Dude, nobody wants me to fix their computers anymore.

Ted: You've been bear stearned, bro.
by Kate Sjostrand March 20, 2008
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after, subsequent, later than, or following after a game. It is a time marked by alcohol consumption, both in celebration and in depressive anxiety resulting from loss, depending upon which team you are on or support.
Ted: Man, that was one hell of a game. Did you see that pass?

Ralph: Yeah, I saw it. It'll be flashing behind my eyes for the remainder of postgame when I'm drowning my sorrow in suds.
by Kate Sjostrand April 5, 2008
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RTSS is an acronym for Reverse Telecommuting – Spousal Support (RTSS), and is defined as the execution of non-employment activities at one’s place of employment as directed (requested) by a spouse or significant other. RTSS can have an adverse effect on the mental well-being of participating males, leading to general aggravation and subsequent participation in a male bitch session.
Ted: Hey, you want to go grab a burger for lunch?

Ralph: Maybe, if I can finish this fuckin’ RTSS.

Ted: Man, that’s rough.

Ralph: Tell me about it. If I had known I’d be doing fucking taxes all day, I’d of just stayed home and sucked down a six.
by Kate Sjostrand April 15, 2008
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