I Saw U2 Live Twice's definitions

crap

1. waste material that can't be disgested or consumed by a person or an animal. Gooshy texture, horrible smell, good for nothing except to fertilize plants - maybe.

2. anything that can't be used for much of anything. Trash. Something substandard, especially when you need something better.

3. lies. A favorite tool for politicians and used car dealers and others who think you're an idiot.

1. a long time ago I was watching the Tonight Show and Jay Leno was joking about the recent American Music Awards show and the new categories that were added that night, who got nominated, who won and so on. He made up a new category: he said that if you combine country music and rap music what do you get?

Country + Rap makes CRAP.

2. Country was once vital, now it's cliched and formulaic. Since Barf Brooks hit it big it's become dumbed down crap for the yuppies.

3. Rap was once fun and creative as well. The first 3 albums by RUN-D.M.C., and stuff from the Fat Boys, L.L. Cool J and Tone Loc were good but now rap is mostly ultra-violent, pornographic, mysogynistic and stupid crap.

4. So look at what Jay Leno said. Combine today's country and today's rap and what do you get?

by I Saw U2 Live Twice July 30, 2009

freedom

1. Liberty, the ability to do what you want to as long as you're not hurting someone else. A cornerstone of the United States of America.

2. A 1985 hit for British duo Wham!.

3. Of all the hit songs that were written after 9/11 that truly expresses America's heritage of liberty, this song by Sir Paul McCartney does it best to do so without turning patriotism into money. It's by a Brit, too. Imagine that. All the other "patriotic" pop and country tunes that the damn radio has been playing are trend-chasing garbage.

1. The U.S. Constitution embodies American freedom and democracy.

2. ... I don't want your freedom
I don't want to play around
I don't want nobody baby
Part time love just brings me down
I don't need your freedom
Girl all I want right now is you
Du du du...

3. ... I will fight for the right
To live in freeee-dom...

by I Saw U2 Live Twice October 2, 2007

Coke and Joke

In the U.S. Navy, in some commands, this is a term meaning "break time". You can use the head (restroom), have a smoke, drink a cola drink, share a joke, talk about anything. AKA "Smoke and Coke".

We're in a specialty school and it's 1 o'clock. Time for a Coke and Joke.

by I Saw U2 Live Twice February 28, 2009

Mr. Big

the worst rock band to ever score a #1 hit. Screechy singing, sloppy and derivative guitar playing, cock rock lyrics, shitty songs, cliches - everything about them just plain sucks.

I saw Mr. Big as an opening act for Rush in 1990 and boy did they ever ess you cee kay. They were so awful most of the people on the grounds got up and went underneath the bleachers until the 45 minute set was up. We all remarked about how extreme the band was in their flat-out suckability. They were the worst band I had ever seen in my life. Rush came on stage after that and rocked the house, like I knew they would. Mr. Big sucks out the ass. Big time.

by I Saw U2 Live Twice June 23, 2006

star spangled banner

Quite simply, it's the national anthem of the United States of America. It was written by Francis Scott Key during the bombardment of Fort McHenry in the War of 1812. The melody was taken from a British pub song and new lyrics were added. The song is EXTREMELY difficult to sing, and even though many famous people have sung it at sporting events, VERY few have ever got it right.

I was watching the 2004 Summer Olympics on TV. They were being broadcast (taped) from Greece. The U.S. womens soccer team had won the Gold medal in the game finals. When they received their medals in a ceremony most of them joined in a vocal rendition of the star spangled banner . It was the most wretched, lousy and downright godawful version of that anthem I ever heard in my life, and I've heard plenty of horrible renditions. This was the famous 15 minutes for the ladies, since the networks, the press (and the general public pretty much too) don't really give a rat's ass about womens sports, let alone soccer as much as they do about football, baseball and basketball - especially as played by men. A moment of national pride for the U.S.A., forgotten in a flash. And so it goes.

by I Saw U2 Live Twice October 24, 2007

Oh My God

One of the most empty headed and grossly overused cliche terms in history. It's a phrase used way to much by dull ignoramuses and lunkheaded dummies who have very limited vocabularies and don't know any other terms to express surprise, amusement, wonder, outrage or other emotions. Too much use of this term can make one look like a big time dumbbutt. On Internet blogs and in writing it's often shortened to the abbreviation "OMG". OMG is also overused tremendously.

1. Moon Unit Zappa: "It's like oh my God! Grody to the max!"

2. Mr. "Higgie Baby" Higgins on "Magnum P.I." often yelled, "Oh-my-GOD!" for many things. This is obviously a comic effect device.

3. Jennifer Aniston got paid $1,000,000 per 20-25 minute episode during the last few seasons of "Friends" to show her nice hair and nice legs, whine a lot and say "Oh my God" many many times. The other members of the show also got a million dead Presidents per episode and they also said "Oh my God" repeatedly.

That ain't working!" - Dire Straits.

4. Tim: Oh my God! Oh my God!

Trent: Oh my God!

Beth: He's my God too!

by I Saw U2 Live Twice September 14, 2011

ann coulter

A fascist bitch demagogue and troublemaker whose violent hatred and bigotry gives Christianity a bad name just like the Middle Eastern terrorists give Islam a bad name. She became a millionaire by peddling screeds of hatred against religious and ethnic minorities, Islam, gays, and of course , "liberals" (that is, people who don't agree with her sick, twisted satanic philosophy). If you read excerts from her books you can see that she is a violent, extremely hateful psychotic. If you've had history class in college you can see she is similar to Hitler, Mussolini, Tojo, and also Slobodan Milosevic - the son-of-a-bitch. She advocates violence against her targets of hatred. She is dangerous. She often has a wild hateful look in her eyes. She needs to be admitted in an asylum and sedated. She is crazy.

Bill: Look at Tony! He's reading that Ann Coulter book again.

George: Tony can't think for himself. He follows any guru who claims to be a Christian. Ain't nothing Christian about Ann Coulter. She's just a plain bitch.

by I Saw U2 Live Twice September 7, 2008