Hogtrude Parker's definitions

Wednesday warrior

Somebody who stormed the United States Capitol on Wednesday, January 6, 2021.

Have you seen all those videos of people getting yoinked at the airport after being identified as Wednesday warriors? What were they expecting, a visit from the Tooth Fairy?

by Hogtrude Parker January 11, 2021

veganism

The belief that non-human animals should not be commodified, exploited, and/or eaten.

“Aw man, I just finished my eighteenth bowl of hummus this week.”
“…Uh, do you subscribe to veganism, by any chance?”

by Hogtrude Parker September 11, 2022

I'm vegan

Something vegans say. It indicates that they are, in fact, vegan.

"I'm vegan," I said.
"We know," said my family, "You tell us that like every single day."
I nodded in acknowledgement and shoved an entire pitcher full of beans into my mouth. "Yes. I'm vegan."

by Hogtrude Parker July 18, 2021

dipshit

Somebody who is sufficiently lacking in common sense or common decency, especially both.

Synonymous with “jackass.”

“Some dipshit ate my last falafel.”
“That was you.”
“Exactly!”

by Hogtrude Parker January 25, 2022

pronoun

A noun that lost its amateur status.

“Damn ya ass fat, whatcha pronouns?”
“Sorry babe, I only got novice nouns.”

by Hogtrude Parker December 14, 2021

Donge l’Orange de la Trumpeter Swange

Donald Trump.

Man, the bird website just isn’t the same now that they’ve actually gone and kicked Donge l’Orange de la Trumpeter Swange out of the nest.

by Hogtrude Parker January 11, 2021

Toluca Lake

A neighborhood of Los Angeles— and, according to their Chamber of Commerce— also a bit of Burbank, California, located in the 818 area code, populated by lots of upper middle-class white people. It is nestled between North Hollywood, Studio City, Universal City, and (the rest of?) Burbank.

A useful stop in case your partner in organized crime accidentally shoots your mole in the face and you need to take the car to a friendly place ASAP, but you’re in the valley, where your boss doesn’t have any friendly places.

“I’m callin’ my partner in Toluca Lake.”
“Where’s Toluca Lake?”
“It’s just over the hill, over by Burbank Studios. If Jimmie’s ass ain’t home, I don’t know what the fuck we gonna do, man, ’cause I ain’t got no other partners in 818.”

by Hogtrude Parker February 3, 2021