Frank Klaune's definitions

ahs-wee-pay

Less commonly as of late, it is the phonetic, literal pronounciation of "asswipe" (said usually with a fake foreign accent). The term is used as a direct replacement for "asswipe" just with the foreign-sounding pronounciation for any of a number of stupid reasons.

"Hey ahs-wee-payyyy... wot's up mon?"

by Frank Klaune March 6, 2004

squirt the dirt

The act of relieving one's self (urinating) outside. Typically the term is used by truck drivers and travelers who have driven many miles (without a truck stop or rest area) and- needing to piss, they pull over to a side road to "squirt the dirt".

Damn, Frank bought that big-ass 200 ounce bladder buster at the truck stop and the next thing you know, we have to pull over to squirt the dirt.

by Frank Klaune February 2, 2005

deliver street pizza

Another stupid term designating vomit, emesis, technicolor yawn, or barfing.

Damn, Frank got so fucked up the other night he had to deliver street pizza on his girlfriend's bird bath. Now the birds don't come by anymore. Frank is such an imbecile!

by Frank Klaune June 24, 2006

butt breath

Common insult with obvious implications. The insult is meant not only to indicate someone who who is stupid and / or offensive, but also one who would do an act which would render their breath like someone else's butt.

Hey, butt breath! Move your car.

by Frank Klaune January 23, 2005

Tomism

General term pertaining to any of a wide number of comical vulgarities, invented insults and mismangulated obscenities and curses made famous by a certain Tom K. (last name omitted)

"Oh, you MOTHER!"
"You FUCKNOB!"
(insert name) "...has an I.Q. of a peanut butter sandwich"
"sons-of-bastages"
"Cancel Christmas forever"
"butt buddy bubba with the burlap balls"
"rump ridin' ridge runner"

by Frank Klaune November 6, 2003

SuperSlap

A difficult maneuver in which one person repeatedly slaps the face of another in a furiously rapid pace. Usually done so quickly that the hand is almost a blur.

"Frank just superslapped the dumbass who insulted him."

by Frank Klaune November 6, 2003

blat

1) Anoter one of many terms designating a type of fart. The "blat" is designated by an explosive blast of rectal gas. While the sound is ferocious, the smell is usually deadly. However the duration (of both the blat and the people standing around the blat-ter) is very brief (pun intended).

2) The type of fart typically associated with "Ocky" and "Clutcher" in the less-well-known comic series of the same name.

3) Designating one of the the two most obnoxious sounds of the tuba. In this context, the term is often spelled "blatt" and associated with "the other" obnoxious sound of the tuba, the "woop". Often the two sounds are grouped together (e.g. "blatting and wooping").

1) We were playing cards when all at once... BLAT! Grodie let one go, and the game was immediately called off.

2) BLAT!

3) Tubas... we're going to try that again. This time without the blatting and wooping.

by Frank Klaune November 21, 2004