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Ednatoast Jeeganflipperwick's definitions

Pork Scotch Pants

Discusting Tartan Boxer shorts that smell like shit. The only reason anyone knows that he wears these is because he came out of the bathroom in the morning while I was witing for the toilet and he had nothing on besides these. He seemed very embarassed and ran as fast as the little man could. When I walked in I realised why he was embarassed and ran to his room. The toilet stank like the worst pile of shit ever created. I ran straight back out. I used a pint of Air freshener and could still smell it at the bottom of the stairs.
ME: You'll never guess what I just saw.

DAD: What?

ME: Lets call them Pork Scotch pants. He came out of the bathroom and ran to his room wearing Tartan boxers. The bathroom stank!
mugGet the Pork Scotch Pantsmug.

Hill Biscuits

A cheap, shit brand of biscuits. They are vile and sweeter than sugar. These are loved by SNUF and so he buys Me and Mickus 20 packs each in every SNUF Bag every week. We hate em so we bog the bastards down the Asda toilets and shit on em. This will be the fate of every Hill Biscuit.
MONKUS: What's in this weeks SNUF Bags?

SWYTHEERBRIDGE: A bag of crisps and 20 packets of Hill Biscuits.

MONKUS: OK I'll eat the crisps now and we'll take the Hill's to Asda to bog em.
mugGet the Hill Biscuitsmug.

Pork Scotch's 'Girlfriend'

A manly, wrinkly woman that is the 'girlfriend of Pork Scotch. She has rabbit teeth and is as ugly and manly as Pork Scotch himself. She has a spac grandson and wears old bagish clothes that shit stained schumachers would wear. By going out with her, this proves Pork Scotch's Homosexuality.
Ugghhh! Look, it's Pork Scotch's 'girlfriend'. I hate her! UGLY Bitch!!! Eating garlic bread at the green plastic table with Porky doing his famous drunken dance.
mugGet the Pork Scotch's 'Girlfriend'mug.

Shaquille O'Neal

A 7 foot tall basketballer, named after Neil for being such an enormous giant.
Hey, look. Is that Shaquille O'Neal, or is it Neil?

You should know that's Neil, no one else is that big.
mugGet the Shaquille O'Nealmug.

Maltby Lorry

A place two streets down where Pork Scotch's cones are hidden from him. This lorry never seems to move and neither does the stolen cone.
PORK SCOTCH: Where's my cone? I bet a bloody nigger's stolen it. Wait. What's that on the back of the Maltby Lorry? It's my cone! Who put it there?
mugGet the Maltby Lorrymug.

Pork Scotch 2

Abreviated to PS2. A second man that has a Pork Scotch but is in complete contrast to the original Pork Scotch. He is actually a really nice bloke that you can relate to and be friends with. Pork Scotch is a boring, fat old security guard that believes he is supreme enough place a cone where he parks his shitty old van with an odd number of windows. PS2 also has a white van with normal van windows that is much cleaner than Pork Scoth's. He will join Pork Scotch at his several barbeques and has a son we call PSP. Pork Scotch 2's real name is Jim. The 2 Pork Scotch's rooms are right next to each other in the same flats building. They each wear different hats, Pork Scotch has a gay buffalo hat and Pork Scotch 2 has a cap.
Me: A up Jim. What are you gonna do today?

Pork Scotch 2: I'm gonna go with Ant and my Mum to town and watch TV with them, mate.

Me: Ok, what about you Harry?

Pork Scotch: I'm gonna go to the pub to watch Arsenal lose and then eat some garlic bread with Goofy Granny.
mugGet the Pork Scotch 2mug.

Vanilla

Nogtard's most eaten Ice Cream. He buys it because it's shit, therefore cheap, so you get more for your money.
Dad: Eatin' ice cream then?

Nogtard: Yeah, it's vanilla. It tastes horrible but you get more.
mugGet the Vanillamug.

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