Cuntoleezza Rice's definitions

penigraph

1. A photo of a penis posted on the Internet. These are often found in personal profiles on gay dating sites.

2. A phonograph without a tonearm used by VERY poorly endowed men.

1. The evangelist was compelled to contact the escort after viewing his penigraph on the Web.

2. The needle dicked bug fucker placed the disk on the penigraph and placed his member in the groove.

by Cuntoleezza Rice January 30, 2007

Holy Water

The water that flows from a priest's butthole after an enema.

Father Pedofuck called to the altar boy "Come here son and help me make some Holy Water."

by Cuntoleezza Rice October 23, 2007

gradutate

To blow chunks at one's graduation, usually from consuming too much alcohol prior to the event.

It was quite a graduation regurgitation. The valedictorian gradutated all over the stage.

by Cuntoleezza Rice January 31, 2007

rapturebate

1. To masturbate while thinking about the Rapture, Mark of the Beast, Great Whore of Babylon, etc.

2. To diddle one's ass while imagining getting Rapture Fucked by Harold Camping.

1. As Rick Santorum stood in the shower thinking about the Rapture his hands moved slowly downward and he began to Rapturebate. He imagined finally being able to tap the Jesus Hole. Yes he knew the Lord was coming soon. Yes coming. coming soon, coming soon...

2. Renowned felcher Pat Robertson stuck four fingers up his saggy old prison wallet and dreamed of his favorite fantasy Sodomy Clown, Harold Camping.

by Cuntoleezza Rice November 13, 2011

twaddle

1. To waddle due to an object inserted in one's bearded taco.

2. To diddle one's twat.

1. She inserted the dildo into her vagina and twaddled off to work.

2. She's so preoccupied she must be twaddling.

by Cuntoleezza Rice February 4, 2007

blumpkindred spirit

A "new friend" found while cruising for sex in a public men's room. The new friend will perform a special sex act (a blumpkin) without even making the recipient get off the toilet.

Repugnican Senator Larry Craig sat down on the crapper and assumed his usual wide stance. He moved his foot toward the next stall thinking the guy next door might want a blowjob while he was taking a dump. He soon realized the guy was an undercover cop, not a blumpkindred spirit.

by Cuntoleezza Rice October 28, 2007

cuntraband

Illicit items concealed in the vagina.

The drug-sniffing dog continued to sniff the woman's crotch, revealing the cuntraband.

by Cuntoleezza Rice November 10, 2006