Colonel Hassle's definitions

Well, doggy!

An expression of intoxicated joy or weariness, misquoting Jed Clampett from the Beverly Hillbillies

(Small bearded guy in beanie hat slumps in chair and puffs on a fat spliff) : Well, doggy!

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Bizee

Vernacular for a turd, usually delivered by woolly backs, or people adjacent to Liverpool with Lancashire or Cheshire accents

Brian: I've done a big bizee and blocked the toilet up again!

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Fake hippy

Anyone wearing long hair because it's fashionable or socially acceptable, ie, many people these days,including dreadlocks, ponytails, and man buns, without any predilection towards or interest in the hippy lifestyle,ie, a total fake or fraud

Look at that stupid scally twat and his long hair, he looks like a fucking psychopath, fake hippy cunt

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Man bun

Modern term for a top knot, popularised by millionaire footballers who think they're film stars or catwalk models, and copied by hipsters and assorted idiots without a speck of individuality but stupidly think they're being different

Look at that stupid hipster cunt with his man bun, I'd like to set his hair and beard alight, the twat!

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Auld slapper

Mature prostitute or slag

Wayne Rooney went with that auld slapper didn't he in that knocking shop in Aigburth?

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Plastic

Supporter of a football club made successful by crude wealth, ie, by sheiks or oligarchs, unfairly blowing competition out of the water, eg , a Man City or Chelsea fan

Man City fan: we're the best team in the world
Liverpool fan: fuck off you stupid manc cunt, you're just a fucking plastic

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Lioness

A grizzled old matriarch with lots of wrinkles and laughter lines

Look at that fucking auld lioness, she smokes 60 bifters ( cigarettes) a day

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019