Colonel Hassle's definitions

Auld slapper

Mature prostitute or slag

Wayne Rooney went with that auld slapper didn't he in that knocking shop in Aigburth?

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Dead pussy

A long neglected elderly lady's pussy effectively in retirement from sex

Blkrod: Dame, I can put a spark back in that dead pussy

by Colonel Hassle July 27, 2019

Take plug

The act of receiving anal sex

Blkrod: I do not pack shit or take plug, get off my cam, not into shitty fucks dude!

by Colonel Hassle July 27, 2019

Shit dawg

An exclamation of satisfaction or wonderment, usually delivered by someone intoxicated on illegal substances

Shit dawg motherfucka, I need some pussy right now!

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Man bun

Modern term for a top knot, popularised by millionaire footballers who think they're film stars or catwalk models, and copied by hipsters and assorted idiots without a speck of individuality but stupidly think they're being different

Look at that stupid hipster cunt with his man bun, I'd like to set his hair and beard alight, the twat!

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019

Hag cunt sniffer

Predominantly, a younger man with a fetish for sniffing pungent old ladys' vaginas, usually prostitutes or slags

That dirty bastard's a real hag cunt sniffer, he loves old sluts

by Colonel Hassle July 27, 2019

Bizee

Vernacular for a turd, usually delivered by woolly backs, or people adjacent to Liverpool with Lancashire or Cheshire accents

Brian: I've done a big bizee and blocked the toilet up again!

by Colonel Hassle July 28, 2019