C-Mills's definitions

head on

Apply directly to the forehead.

Head On. Apply directly to the forehead. Head On. Apply directly to the forehead.

"Goddamn...If I watch this commercial enough times, I'm gonna NEED some Head On..."

by C-Mills January 9, 2008

no sure, shitlock

Spoonerism of "no shit sherlock." Same idea, but used to denote an even higher level of sarcasm.

Dad: "All this Loose Change stuff is based on bullshit"
Me: "No sure, shitlock"

by C-Mills June 10, 2010

dane cook

Observational comedian who makes the most mundane (no pun intended) aspects of life hilarious. He talks about stuff we can all relate to, so he doesn't have to offend anyone to be funny (except maybe for prude assholes who don't like the F-word).

Unfortunately, a lot of Dane's fans are idiots who probably have never listened to other excellent comedians like Lewis Black or Ben Bailey...but that doesn't take away from his greatness.

"THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE HIGHLANDER! TIRES CANNOT DEFEAT ME!"

"Fucken door! I don't like to be in a perfect square when I shit!"

Dane Cook is a Red Sox fan...Hey, nobody's perfect...

by C-Mills January 18, 2008

theory of a deadman

See "Nickelback"

Seriously. I can't tell the difference between Theory of a Deadman and Nickelback. What the fuck is with all these shitty rock bands that sound like each other?

by C-Mills January 21, 2010

Pittsburgh Suicide

The act of walking through Pittsburgh while wearing a Neil O'Donnell jersey

"An unidentified man was found dead outside Primanti Bros. this morning...He was wearing acid-wash jeans and a black Neil O'Donnell jersey, which suggests this was the fourth successful case of Pittsburgh Suicide this week...Found near the body were a white male resembling Brett Keisel and a black male resembling LaMarr Woodley; neither have been questioned."

by C-Mills December 7, 2011

diplomacy

The act of telling someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.

Typical U.S. diplomacy:

"Yeah, we've just killed 200,000 innocent civilians, but you gotta break a few eggs to make an omelet, right?

by C-Mills February 22, 2008

reo speedwagon

Rock band known for a string of hit songs in the '80s, such as "Can't Fight This Feeling" and "Take it on the Run"

synonomous with "overrated"

REO Speedwagon is the most overrated band ever; they just played the same song over and over again and changed the lyrics a little bit

"Goddammit...REO Speedwagon wrote another shitty love song."
"Yeah...they're just a crappy rip-off of Styx."

by C-Mills November 3, 2008