Burt Milhorse Eriksson's definitions

statcoulomb

Onomatopoeia: a sound that you make when you accidentally swallow the pit of a peach. Extremely dangerous – you're not a seagul, dude, so don't do it on purpose!

Melvin: "*munch, munch* So, I was sitting there *slurps* perusing through the latest issue of.. *gak* Eeeerp! Eeeerp! *glom* Hnhhhh! Hrrnhngh! *gasp*"
Bob: "Dude! What in the name of Christ almighty are you doing?"
Melvin: "*STATCOULOMB‼* Ahhh, that's better..."

by Burt Milhorse Eriksson April 16, 2021

lemonfinger

When one picks one's rectum and then takes the finger to someone's nose and asks: "Do you smell lemon?"

Bob: "Hey, did you ever lemonfinger anyone in school?"
Gary: "Yeah, I did it to my shop class teacher!"
Connie: "Dear bin Laden, please take me now..."

by Burt Milhorse Eriksson April 18, 2021

mesh

The symbol # i.e. mesh is known as the number sign, hash or – in North America – the pound sign. Babies and kiddies started calling it hashtag somewhere in the 2010s and it became one the most cancerous forced memes ever, breaking through from the internet into real life.

Bob: "I remember when the »fence made of brushwood» symbol was called »mesh»."
Connie: "»Mesh»?"
Bob: "Yeah, you know – the »#» sign."
Connie: "Oh, THAT fucking cancer...!"

by Burt Milhorse Eriksson June 4, 2021

dirt-switching

When you are trying on the fly to change your facts you use as your arguments in a debate, albeit they are coherent and valid facts that are related to each other. It refers to the act of trying to change the dirt, on which your vegetables or plants are growing, into a better, more fertile soil amidst the growing season.

Bob: "...yet somehow this small group of people are responsible for..
Melvin: "Bigot! Hate speech! You talk like that in 2021? SERIOUSLY?"
Bob: "Well, this same group of people are still less likely to be shot at by the police.."
Melvin: "Racist! Bigot! Hate crime! Dirt-switching! DIRT-SWITCHING!"

by Burt Milhorse Eriksson June 26, 2021

prequel

A contamination i.e. a failed portmanteau. Comes from "pre"+"sequel" of which the latter in turn comes from Latin, "sequela"; "what follows". Therefore it is a non-word à la new/memespeak, as "quel" does not mean anything in any known language and thus "pre"+"quel" means nothing either.

Melvin: "Have you seen the prequel to »The Hangover»?"
Bob: "Have I seen what to WHAT?"

by Burt Milhorse Eriksson April 13, 2021

legit

Short for "legitimate". NOT short for "legitimately" which is a totally different word. The difference is roughly the same as between "good" and "well" – in case you cared. An extremely popular yet badly understood filler word.

Melvin: "Bill Murray must be legit the most underrated comedian ever!"
Sparky: "IKR? He could've been literally one of the greatest, though."

by Burt Milhorse Eriksson April 11, 2021