Brett Burkhardt's definitions
When someone with a hard on grinds it against your ass while dancing, cuddling, spooning, or just standing behind you.
Tanya loved spooning but hated when her boyfriend used it as an excuse to go knocking at the back door all night.
“That guy at the bar was cute but he was knocking at the back door all night on the dance floor and that’s why I didn’t go home with him. Why bring someone home if you know he’s just packing half a roll of Life Savers in his pants?”
“That guy at the bar was cute but he was knocking at the back door all night on the dance floor and that’s why I didn’t go home with him. Why bring someone home if you know he’s just packing half a roll of Life Savers in his pants?”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Knocking at the back door mug.Alicia was an expert at flirt and divert. She'd approach a guy at the bar, flirt with him all night so long as he paid for the drinks, and then left towards the end of the night when he went to the bathroom.
"I'm going to give her a ride home but she wants to stop at the gas station first."
"Dude, it's just flirt and divert, she's done it at every party I've seen her at. She's going to ask you for some smokes and then will run up a huge tab. The second you pull up she'll jump out and run up to her apartment without so much as a thank you."
"I'm going to give her a ride home but she wants to stop at the gas station first."
"Dude, it's just flirt and divert, she's done it at every party I've seen her at. She's going to ask you for some smokes and then will run up a huge tab. The second you pull up she'll jump out and run up to her apartment without so much as a thank you."
by Brett Burkhardt May 12, 2008
Get the flirt and divert mug.To avoid answering questions directly because you don't know the answer, or you don't want the person to talking to knowing the real answer, and talking about another subject you do know something about, or something to flatter or distract the other person, instead. Also resorting to speaking in talking points, folksy colloquialisms, or buzz words to avoid answering questions while trying to look like you know what you're talking about and to keep from having to give an honest or valid answer.
"I didn't do any research for my oral report on raising chickens so I pulled a Palin and started talking about how to make fried chicken."
"I knew that car salesman was full of crap when he pulled a Palin on every question I asked about the car. The last straw was when I asked him about gas mileage and he just said, 'Little lady, I can tell you all day about how few times you'll need to take this pony to the trough but we ought to close the barn door on it before some eagle eye rustles it up from ya. Why don't we just talk about it in the office while I get the papers ready' I ran as fast as I could.
"When I asked my boyfriend about the rumor he was doing gay porn, he pulled a Palin and mumbled something about my friends trying to pull a smear campaign."
"If he asks you what you were doing afternoon, pull a Palin and talk about your new car and how cute his kids are."
"I knew that car salesman was full of crap when he pulled a Palin on every question I asked about the car. The last straw was when I asked him about gas mileage and he just said, 'Little lady, I can tell you all day about how few times you'll need to take this pony to the trough but we ought to close the barn door on it before some eagle eye rustles it up from ya. Why don't we just talk about it in the office while I get the papers ready' I ran as fast as I could.
"When I asked my boyfriend about the rumor he was doing gay porn, he pulled a Palin and mumbled something about my friends trying to pull a smear campaign."
"If he asks you what you were doing afternoon, pull a Palin and talk about your new car and how cute his kids are."
by Brett Burkhardt January 16, 2009
Get the Pull a Palin mug.Rick didn’t mind working for the county health dept but he hated having to try and give exposure disclosures when all he had to work with were screen names.
Mrs. Manners says, if you’re going to make an exposure disclosure you should at least have the balls to do it by phone.
Mrs. Manners says, if you’re going to make an exposure disclosure you should at least have the balls to do it by phone.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Exposure Disclosure mug."He sent me 20 texts today which is odd. He hardly ever texts and said he had the runs."
"I think he was toilet texting you."
"Gross!"
"I think he was toilet texting you."
"Gross!"
by Brett Burkhardt May 12, 2008
Get the Toilet Texting mug.Ever since Casey got a raise, Missy has been waging a whisper war about him all over the office.
“If that bitch thinks she’s going to start a whisper war with me I’ll beat her ass after study hall.”
“If that bitch thinks she’s going to start a whisper war with me I’ll beat her ass after study hall.”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Whisper War mug.The congressman was committing suicide by slut when he took those tranny hookers to the pay by the hour motel just three blocks down from the local tv station.
When Greg told us he doesn’t use condoms with the skanks he brings home from the bar we all knew he was committing suicide by slut.
When Greg told us he doesn’t use condoms with the skanks he brings home from the bar we all knew he was committing suicide by slut.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Suicide by Slut mug.