Blue Cawdrey's definitions

Makeover

A current trend in television programs where people are told that they do not match the cultural norm either in the way they look or dress. Using special effects, advanced computer manipulation and spray painting techniques the person is then given the illusion that they look like a film star or can afford to buy top line designer clothes while bringing up two small children on a part time job serving fries.

While showing the person 'before' is common. The post 'make over' victim is not often seen.

She thought the television makeover would change her life, but the next day on looking in the mirror she noticed that her acne, goofy teeth and the huge wart on her nose had somehow mysteriously re-appeared.

by Blue Cawdrey November 23, 2004

Barrack room lawyer

1) UK: A member of the British army that knows every paragraph, clause and sub clause of the Kings or Queens regulations, a book regulating discipline in the British forces.

2) A person that can get out of trouble by a thourogh knowlege of the rules.

Squady 1: Private Houdini's been charged with insubordination, do you think he will be found guilty?

Squady 2: Nah! He will get away with it again by quoting Queens regulations, he is a true barrack room lawyer.

by Blue Cawdrey November 21, 2004

Gutter shag

Tobacco reclaimed from discarded cigarete butts.

The bag lady shuffled along looking for butt ends to top up her tin of gutter shag

by Blue Cawdrey November 19, 2004

High wee

High wee's: Game played by male schoolkids mostly in the school toilet.
The objective being to see who can leave the highest and wettest mark above the urinal.

Johny: Hey mommy guess what?

Mommy: What Johny?

Johny: I won at high wee's today.

Mommy: (Thought bubble)Wonder what high wee's are; mentle shudder; better not ask....

Yes dear.

by Blue Cawdrey November 21, 2004

bishops helmet

The end of the Penis is sometimes called the bishops helmet due to its resemblance the cerimonial mitre hat worn by bishops.

He awoke with an erection and decided to beat or batter the bishop.

by Blue Cawdrey November 18, 2004

Spanner job

UK: Used to describe the fifty pence piece due to its seven sided design and its resembelence to a nut*.

*As in nut and bolt.

Customer: Barman! can I have change for the cig machine.
Barman: How much do y' need?
Customer: A couple of spanner jobs should sort it, ta!

by Blue Cawdrey November 21, 2004

Brains were dynamite

Admonishment to someone who has done something stupid or had a brain-fart.

This is what happens when you do not use your indicator, if brains were dynamite you would not have enough to blow your hat* off.

*alt. Ears

by Blue Cawdrey November 28, 2004