6 definitions by emotional_invalid
an evil world wide retail empire that treats their employees like shit. its alot more subtle than the old factory when your boss would swear at you. most anything you buy there will fall apart sooner than later. or it is shit quality to begin with. what do you expect from young chinese women who work 70+ hours a week and are confined to a prison like dormitory in mainland china mega sweatshops.
i use to go to walmart cause i am an insomniac and to look at all the college pussy shopping and fucking around in the big box shit hole(wal mart). but for the past year of so my penis is stuck in the 6 oclock position. i lost my libido, probably due to a long period of stress and the result being depression. now i am an emotional invalid on ssi.
i use to go to walmart cause i am an insomniac and to look at all the college pussy shopping and fucking around in the big box shit hole(wal mart). but for the past year of so my penis is stuck in the 6 oclock position. i lost my libido, probably due to a long period of stress and the result being depression. now i am an emotional invalid on ssi.
i bought the toshiba sattelite special xmas laptop for 400usd + a 50 dollar extra warranty. i noticed on the first day i tried it out, video was choppy or bad quality even though i have broadband shared with my landlord upstairs. it crashes alot. it can manage some 3d but it just crashes on most 3d programs. the keyboard is already falling apart. it freezes up alot. the graphics card is a mystery because they act like your too stupid to know that that is the most important part of a computer today. you can have all the ram up your ass, and all the hard drive and all the processing speed in the world, and a super fast connection, but if you have shit for a graphics card you got a circa 1990's machine(i.e. pc)as far as graphic and video are concerned. so i'm fucking told.
i think wal mart and toshiba got together and took the graphics card out and sold this last years model for 389 usd to screw the buyer and make profit on something worth less than what third world children get on that ugly green thing. although the crank dynamo is very smart:free electricity via human effort. in australia, or wherever, they have a pull chord like on dolls that talk or like an old lawnmower. this is an even more efficient way or producing human made electricity. just pull and the fly wheel just multiplies your effort many times.
reader: hasus christos you dumb fuck why didn't you bring it back if you knew it was shit in the firs couple days. i mean wal fart gives you 15 days you moron.
me: yeah, i know all that. like i said i am an emotional invalid and holidays were really fucking, like suicidal. i overused my klonopin(in the valium family of drugs) and my fucking idiot doctor(i.e.psychiatrist) almost didn't write me a refill. benzo withdrawal is worse than opiate detox. i was almost in a world of shit on top of the world of shit i am already in.
so now its a month and a half later and i guess sooner or later i'll call their warranty guy who they say are contracted out and come to your house. ahhh thats nice and convenient for me, but chances are the kid probably knows shit about computers just like, me and is ordered by wal fart to say: can't be fixed.
i think wal mart and toshiba got together and took the graphics card out and sold this last years model for 389 usd to screw the buyer and make profit on something worth less than what third world children get on that ugly green thing. although the crank dynamo is very smart:free electricity via human effort. in australia, or wherever, they have a pull chord like on dolls that talk or like an old lawnmower. this is an even more efficient way or producing human made electricity. just pull and the fly wheel just multiplies your effort many times.
reader: hasus christos you dumb fuck why didn't you bring it back if you knew it was shit in the firs couple days. i mean wal fart gives you 15 days you moron.
me: yeah, i know all that. like i said i am an emotional invalid and holidays were really fucking, like suicidal. i overused my klonopin(in the valium family of drugs) and my fucking idiot doctor(i.e.psychiatrist) almost didn't write me a refill. benzo withdrawal is worse than opiate detox. i was almost in a world of shit on top of the world of shit i am already in.
so now its a month and a half later and i guess sooner or later i'll call their warranty guy who they say are contracted out and come to your house. ahhh thats nice and convenient for me, but chances are the kid probably knows shit about computers just like, me and is ordered by wal fart to say: can't be fixed.
by emotional_invalid January 26, 2009
In the mid atlantic region, term of comtempt, lotheing, derogatory.
note(spelling errors may be included in this submission. could you at Urban Dictionary correct some of it? yeah i know i am being a jizz bag. its equally ok if you don't. thanks)
note(spelling errors may be included in this submission. could you at Urban Dictionary correct some of it? yeah i know i am being a jizz bag. its equally ok if you don't. thanks)
the war on drugs is perpetrated by stupid jizz bags(e.g.voters) and money launderers
cheney is a jizz bag(and satan incarnate).
coaches who scream at little league footballers are jizz bags.
parents who push their kids to play american football are jizzbags.
(parents and passersby who stop to watch tiny kids play american football are stupid jizz bags and lard assess.
my best friend is a jizz bag.
my wife is a jizz bag.
my dog is a jizz bag.
dust mites are jizz bags.
the mouse killed in the mouse trap was a jizz bag for gushing puke, blood and shit on it.
my girlfriend is a jizz bag.
etcetera ad infinitum
cheney is a jizz bag(and satan incarnate).
coaches who scream at little league footballers are jizz bags.
parents who push their kids to play american football are jizzbags.
(parents and passersby who stop to watch tiny kids play american football are stupid jizz bags and lard assess.
my best friend is a jizz bag.
my wife is a jizz bag.
my dog is a jizz bag.
dust mites are jizz bags.
the mouse killed in the mouse trap was a jizz bag for gushing puke, blood and shit on it.
my girlfriend is a jizz bag.
etcetera ad infinitum
by emotional_invalid January 6, 2009
Most often used as a derogatory modifier for example "my brother is a fucking creep".
However can be used in a neutral or positive way.
"you are the best fucking shoe repairman i have ever had the fucking pleasure to have my shoes fixed by"
However can be used in a neutral or positive way.
"you are the best fucking shoe repairman i have ever had the fucking pleasure to have my shoes fixed by"
I found the positive or neutral use of the word fucking as a teen hitchhiking through Pennsylvania in the early 1970's. A guy driving and a female sitting next to him, gave me and my friend a ride. So we started hearing from him utterances like:
"Jesus its a fucking beautiful day. Thank you Lord"
to his female friend"How's your fucking aunt doing? I hope she's feeling better". she replies yes she feels better. him: "that fucking great man"
and so on
when he dropped us off at the exit he had to turn off the interstate onto, He said, "Hey you two take it fucking easy ok?!"
He smiled and drove off
"Jesus its a fucking beautiful day. Thank you Lord"
to his female friend"How's your fucking aunt doing? I hope she's feeling better". she replies yes she feels better. him: "that fucking great man"
and so on
when he dropped us off at the exit he had to turn off the interstate onto, He said, "Hey you two take it fucking easy ok?!"
He smiled and drove off
by emotional_invalid January 26, 2009
if god is truly all loving and merciful he must not be perfect. for example god can't be every where at the same time. the history of civilization has for the most part been the march of time knee deep in blood and killed humans. god could have had to go to another part of the universe to start a new science project and leave this one. or maybe to fight evil or some other shit that was of grave importance. however god tunes in to planet earth from time to time and does give us some nice things like the music of mozart, bossa nova music and dance, me:mo and other idm/alpha wave music artists, nice days with puffy white clouds in the sky, dusk and dawn,pictures and videos of foreign naked, LEGAL young women on met-art(et al) to jerk off to, and the like.
by emotional_invalid January 28, 2009
Actually bling bling has been around for quite some time. You can go back millenia and it has been found at many archealogical sites.
In post ww2 Hollywood Liz Taylor was a well known whore for flashy extravagent, showy jewlry. Her most famous husband, UK and US actor Richard Burton took up residence in Switzerland, to avoid paying British taxes so his fat whore wife could extract millions of usd or british pounds in bling bling out of the increasingly wet brained, drunken(once fine)actor.
In post ww2 Hollywood Liz Taylor was a well known whore for flashy extravagent, showy jewlry. Her most famous husband, UK and US actor Richard Burton took up residence in Switzerland, to avoid paying British taxes so his fat whore wife could extract millions of usd or british pounds in bling bling out of the increasingly wet brained, drunken(once fine)actor.
by emotional_invalid January 26, 2009
When i grew up in the 60s and 70s a dork was usually a thin gangly guy who was spastic . His hair might have been brushed backwards instead of over the forehead . His hair might have been curly and that was also unacceptable to youth norms of the 1960s . He may have been academically or not academically inclined . I knew a guy who was a dork but could kick anyone's ass if the jerk confronted the dork to fight, if the jerk persisted and punched first after several efforts of diplomacy by this dork i knew . A dork is also socially inept or goofy according to majoritarian norms . However reasonable or intelligent people have no problem with socializing and talking to and understanding dorks
Dork sense two : A dork is actually the penis, usually used in reference to whales. ( i.e. The dork of the blue whale is the largest of all mammals'.) True fact.
Dork sense two : A dork is actually the penis, usually used in reference to whales. ( i.e. The dork of the blue whale is the largest of all mammals'.) True fact.
guy A Hey that guy is a dork
guy B yeah , he sure is ganly , thin and has a neck like a goose
guy A Wow that guy has a dick as big as a whale's in this porn video !
guy B a whales penis is called a dork
guy B yeah , he sure is ganly , thin and has a neck like a goose
guy A Wow that guy has a dick as big as a whale's in this porn video !
guy B a whales penis is called a dork
by emotional_invalid January 23, 2019