The Gonzo Lecture's definitions

needle choir

A pleasant crescendo caused by the multiple sounds of tattoo artists' needles in a tattoo studio.

Jase the Inker: Isn't that a pleasant sound to the ears of the needle choir?

Customer: Ah fuck, watch what you're doing, that really hurts you fucker!

by The Gonzo Lecture April 18, 2010

masturprank

A term first coined by Dr Gregory House in season 6 episode 13 to denote the feigning of a practical joke on oneself to avert suspicion from other people about one's guilt as a prankster.

Wilson:You created empirical proof that I didn't prank you selling me on the notion that you didn't prank. Maybe you self-pranked.

House: I don't masturprank

by The Gonzo Lecture March 25, 2010

pedagogy

A word used by academics to confuse students and justify all manner of outrageous crimes against humanity in the name of education. It is primarily applied in situations when an academic requires the ability to smokescreen their own maladjusted intention and win unwinnable arguments with the minimum amount of effort.

Jane "Professor, I'd like you to explain to me why I got such a low grade."

Professor "Well I don't really have the time to explain the inner workings of pedagogy to you young lady. Even if i did, I'm not sure I could help you to understand."

Jane "Huh? What are you talking about?"

Professor "You see? Exactly."

by The Gonzo Lecture March 3, 2010

wow factor

An important aspect of experience design which can be applied in a variety of contexts and applications depending on the event concerned and the required outcome. In events, the "wow" factor refers to an impressive and impactful element of the design which is used by the designer to reinforce particular aspects of the attendant's experience, usually resulting in particular sensory stimulation (visual, auditory, etc) which can be used to facilitate memory formation and retention afterwards. Whilst popularly thought to require originality in creativity, the wow factor is usually produced using cues familiar to its receivers.

Bill: Wow, look at those fireworks dude, they are really special.

Ben: Wow, yeah dude. They really add the wow factor. Totally fucking unforgettable.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 5, 2010

Avatared

Refers to being stepped over and ignored with respect to one's rightful accolades. It's origin stems from the audacious treatment of the movie Avatar by the Oscar's Award committee in the 2010 ceremony when it picked up only 3 production related awards and lost out to another, much less grossing movie called Hurt Locker.

Dude 1: I can't understand why I never get promoted at work.

Dude 2: That's because you keep gettin Avatared.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 8, 2010

office reorganisation

A sadistic and senseless activity carried out by departmental managers to reassert their power over underlings when their previous cynical management strategies such as teamwork, motivation and front line empowerment have accidentally worked more effectively than could have ever been predicted. Office reorganisation involves creating a fictional reason for getting employees to throw out all their previous years' work, breaking up close collegial relationships and generally restoring a feeling of fear and intimidation which result in the employee realising once again who is in charge.

Manager: Well Bill, it looks like you'll need to move desks to the corner over there in the office reorganisation.

Bill: But I'm working quite well here next to Sandra. Also I have a lot of work to do at the moment.

Manager: Don't be a cunt Bill. Do what you're told. The office reorganisation takes top priority. Just get it done.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 3, 2010

par down

Managementspeak for "no you can't have one".

Employee: can I have another cupboard to store things in my office?

Manager: we are presently seeking to "par down" the amount of storage in this particular area.

by The Gonzo Lecture March 11, 2010