703 definitions by Monkey's Dad

During a time of austerity and scarcity, the fond recalling of foods you once loved.
Having eaten meagerly for weeks, he tried to conjure the smell of retrotisserie, shared meals from the recent past, now a comforting and beautiful dream.
by Monkey's Dad March 28, 2020
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Day one: Bring her coffee in bed, in a personalized pink mug. She will think you show potential.
Day two: C'mon man, we gave you day one. The rest is up to you.
He knew it was one of those "If you need to ask" things. But still, being clueless, he entered "How To Be Nice" and held his breath.
by Monkey's Dad November 30, 2022
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Perfect in every way, no foolin'.
Describing her wrydyllic Hollywood upbringing, with her famously absent, movie-star father, her alcoholic mother's three-day orgies that allowed her no place to hide, her joyous hitch-hiking escape up the coast to Haight-Ashbury at 14, she kept a straight face and slight smile, the better to confound her interviewer.
by Monkey's Dad March 6, 2020
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An unproven, minimally-tested 'cure' for COVID-19 virus.
Touted by extreme fringe-dwelling figures, and by an American President who knows nothing more than what "people are saying", hydroxychloroquine may or may not have medicinal properties where coronavirus is present. It has, however, been shown to be lethal when taken as directed.
by Monkey's Dad April 10, 2020
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What a stable genius says when he means 'write well'.
"I wonder whether somebody like that can write good" Trump said, of author Bob Woodward. "I don't think he can, but let's see what happens." Indeed.
by Monkey's Dad September 11, 2020
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"Man, I've been working like a dog", he muttered into the phone, his feet up, eyes on the game, the bag of Doritos on his chest almost empty. There must have been a time, long ago, he imagined, when dogs spent their lives herding cattle from sunrise to sunset, but any actual 21st century dog he knew was lazier than The Dude.
by Monkey's Dad March 1, 2020
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A currently-living, proudly primitive person. A surprisingly vivid embodiment of attitudes and aptitudes thought to be long-extinct.
No need to ask who he's voting for, he's a card-carrying, open-carrying Neoanderthal.
by Monkey's Dad September 18, 2019
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