Definitions by Scotty Nice
Lasagna Style
When, as a prank of course, you and your friends shit in someone else’s toilet and layer it like lasagna. Shit, paper, shit, paper, shit, paper and don’t flush.
We were at Trudie’s party last weekend and unloaded lasagna style in her master bathroom. We stacked it so high the lid wouldn’t close.
Lasagna Style by Scotty Nice February 5, 2026
Turkey day votive
When you invite a gay midget to Thanksgiving and indicate which guest’s dick he’s supposed to suck by placing a lit votive under the chair of said “getter” of the fellatio.
I had the weirdest thanksgiving experience yesterday. There was a game called Turkey Day votive and basically they hired a midget to suck a random guest’s dick. It was crazy but I really enjoyed the BJ.
Turkey day votive by Scotty Nice November 28, 2024
Christine's cum filled Cribbage
When a man is able to achieve his three greatest pleasures in one sitting by reading a Stephen King novel, playing online cribbage and having your butthole filled with man mayo.
I was talking to my buddy and learned he loves three things - reading Stephen King novels, playing cribbage and getting butt fucked. He then proceeded to tell me for some reason that after he got home one night and his family was out of town, he picked up and started to read Christine by Stephen King, played online cribbage and then had a male prostitute given him a prostate exam with his erect wiener. He succeeded in getting Christine's cum filled Cribbage. Wild stuff.
Christine's cum filled Cribbage by Scotty Nice October 18, 2023
Coup d'etwat
When a man attempts to steal a woman's boyfriend by any means necessary so he can get in her pants. No tactic is off the table including bullying (online and in person), rumor spreading and physical violence to show he is a weak individual.
I really wanted to bang Trudie, so I set out to conquer her vagine by attempting a coup d'etwat against her weak ass boyfriend. I started by posting pictures I made of him online wearing lingerie and fingering his butthole then followed it up by beating him to a pulp in the bathroom at lunch. It worked and now Trudie and I are banging.
Coup d'etwat by Scotty Nice October 18, 2023
Stiff as a Ball
When you see someone hitting a golf ball and you feel bad for them because you assume they have prosthetic legs. Their ability to flex and move their lower extremities is so bad that you imagine they were hit by a train as a child or had polio because their parents were anti-vaxxers.
So I was watching this guy tee off the other day and I felt so sad thinking of what happened to them as a child. Then I watched them walk away and it was perfectly normal. He was stiff as a ball hitting a golf shot, but walked fine. Really bizarre, must be at least a 10 handicap without an actual handicap.
Stiff as a Ball by Scotty Nice July 27, 2023
Mickey’s hat of despair
When you take your family to the magical world of Disney and spend five days in scorching ball dripping heat, getting run over by heifers in electric scooters and spending more than half your salary on Mickey shaped treats while getting in two rides a day and all you come away with is a hat with a picture of that mother fucker on the front.
My husband was so angry when we were finally leaving Disney that to commemorate the financial destruction we had just gone though he decided to buy one last thing, Mickey’s hat of despair. I’m not sure we will ever recover.
Mickey’s hat of despair by Scotty Nice June 16, 2023
Lopey Left Eye
When your older male friend can no longer see out of his left eye because of receiving a high speed shot of ejaculate directly to his eyeball during his sexual experimentation days. The eye survives for several years until the effect of the impact makes it such that glasses can no longer serve a beneficial purpose.
Damn I got a hummer from that MILF Trudie last night and I'd been saving up my load all week. She didn't want to swallow so when I was about to finish I blasted my goo so hard at her eye I doubt she will be able to see in a few years. She gonna have that Lopey Left Eye.
Lopey Left Eye by Scotty Nice May 16, 2023