A Professional Agent, Manager, Representative or Talent Scout of -mongers, such as Fish-mongers, Iron-mongers and War-mongers.
(It should be noted that the organizer of industry events specifically for the Monger-monger community is called a Monger-monger-monger.)
(It should be noted that the organizer of industry events specifically for the Monger-monger community is called a Monger-monger-monger.)
Bill the Fish-monger: “Hi Brian, does Dave represent you, too?”
Brian the Iron-monger: “Hi Bill, yes he does. Dave is the best Monger-monger in town.”
Barry the War-monger: “I will fight you both… if Dave thinks that’s the right next move for me.”
Brian the Iron-monger: “Hi Bill, yes he does. Dave is the best Monger-monger in town.”
Barry the War-monger: “I will fight you both… if Dave thinks that’s the right next move for me.”
by Heisenbeast - Lord of Hounds February 15, 2019

Teacher: “Where is Nick?”
Nick’s Sister: “He missed the bus this morning.”
Teacher: “That gut-bucket probably spent twenty minutes just trying to tie his shoe laces. What a win-challenged excuse for lumpy lard that kid is."
Nick’s Sister: “He missed the bus this morning.”
Teacher: “That gut-bucket probably spent twenty minutes just trying to tie his shoe laces. What a win-challenged excuse for lumpy lard that kid is."
by Heisenbeast - Lord of Hounds March 22, 2019

One who buys, sells, or partakes in the production and manufacture of fur goods such as coats, hats etc.
Dave: "Nice Mink coat, bitch!"
Sally: "Dave, be nice."
Dave: Shut up, Mom. How would you like it if I killed your precious Pomeranian and used her fur to make an adorable bag to keep my ballsack warm."
Sally: "Firstly, SHE is a HE, and secondly, he is a Terrier, not a Pomeranian."
Dave: "and YOU... are a furderer."
Sally: "Dave, be nice."
Dave: Shut up, Mom. How would you like it if I killed your precious Pomeranian and used her fur to make an adorable bag to keep my ballsack warm."
Sally: "Firstly, SHE is a HE, and secondly, he is a Terrier, not a Pomeranian."
Dave: "and YOU... are a furderer."
by Heisenbeast - Lord of Hounds February 12, 2019

Strategy. When offered two or more reasonable and practical approaches to a challenge, “Lombard’s Way” would be to strategically choose a third, unreasonable or impractical response. (Orig. from J. M. Lombard’s seminal work: Spear warfare in the age of tanks”)
Wing Man: “Dude, she is totally checking you out.”
Alpha Male: “What are my options?”
Wing Man: “I see two good approaches; 1) smile at her and introduce your self, or 2) ask her if you can buy her and her friends a drink. Both are strong.”
Alpha Male: “Excellent, and agreed. But I think I will kiss you instead for about 15 seconds.”
Wing Man: “Sweet strategy. Textbook use of Lombard’s Way.”
Alpha Male: “What are my options?”
Wing Man: “I see two good approaches; 1) smile at her and introduce your self, or 2) ask her if you can buy her and her friends a drink. Both are strong.”
Alpha Male: “Excellent, and agreed. But I think I will kiss you instead for about 15 seconds.”
Wing Man: “Sweet strategy. Textbook use of Lombard’s Way.”
by Heisenbeast - Lord of Hounds February 13, 2019

A covert & ingenious way to label the Sousaphone player of a marching-band as a loser, by pretending to accidentally mispronounce the ridiculous instrument he has to carry.
Marching-band spectator #1: “Oh, god, here they come.”
Marching-band spectator #2: “Drummers #killingit, cheerleaders #SoHot. Who’s that on Loserphone, sorry, I mean Sousaphone?”
Marching-band spectator #1: “Nick.”
Marching-band spectator #2: “Figures.”
Marching-band spectator #2: “Drummers #killingit, cheerleaders #SoHot. Who’s that on Loserphone, sorry, I mean Sousaphone?”
Marching-band spectator #1: “Nick.”
Marching-band spectator #2: “Figures.”
by Heisenbeast - Lord of Hounds March 22, 2019

Verb: To spend years investigating something yet end up having no opinion about it.
(Note: one who muels is known as a Mueller
(Note: one who muels is known as a Mueller
by Heisenbeast - Lord of Hounds March 24, 2019

The measure of moisture in you - used as a metric to determine how much you want it. High youmidity means that you are hot, moist, sticky or wet - indicating you want it really bad - and low youmidity means you are cold and dry - indicating you lack empathy and need to relax.
Booty Caller: “Hi honey-bun, I’m sorry I haven’t called in a while. I’ve been super busy with work. I miss you. How’s the weather where you are?”
Booty Callee: “High youmidity, babe. How quickly can you get here?”
Booty Callee: “High youmidity, babe. How quickly can you get here?”
by Heisenbeast - Lord of Hounds February 14, 2019
