Eric Kazinsky's definitions

Monsters Theory

Monsters Theory is the now-mainstream belief that very large breasts on young, lean women is the single most attractive look a woman can have, despite it having a relatively limited genetic basis (as studies of female siblings have shown) There is no established explanation for how women with 25-30% body fat and large breasts have their figures but luck seems to play the biggest role, since their looks and their breasts both are not an accurate reflection of their parents. The theory that attractive parents produce attractive children has become eroded due to monsters theory. Monsters theory states that genetics play some role, but far less than expected and otherwise ugly, fat parents with not particularly good genes can unleash bombshells on the world.

Example: Guy 1: Did you see that girl at the gym? Man, those were huge!
Guy 2: Monsters Theory in action. Let the monsters do the talkin.’
Guy 3: You scared bro?

by Eric Kazinsky November 3, 2015

Like Whore

A Like Whore is a woman who seeks out likes on the internet that are only obtained due to her face and her breasts being exposed in scantily-clad outfits. This is usually done via Facebook in the form of the exact same pose and picture type being taken and posted 30 times. A key feature of a Like Whore is that she does not consider herself a whore or immoral in any way, and says she would never do cam shows or prostitution. Nevertheless, men respect women who do cam shows more than those who are Like Whores due to the honesty and integrity of the cam show whore girls in comparison. If you are going to show off your nearly nude body for male attention constantly, at least be honest about it.

Guy 1: Why does the girl at work show a million different close-ups of her breasts in her Facebook pictures? Did she forget men like those things? Or she’s just checking in on us?
Guy 2: She’s a Like Whore. She should go full throttle and just be honest and move to Dubai and start sucking dick, designing art, and interior decorating.

by Eric Kazinsky May 17, 2016

Ding Dong Ditch

When you stick your thick cock into a woman's pussy and run away without cumming, as if to say gotcha! Alternatively, it can mean simply having sex with a woman once and disappearing into the mist. The least popular use of the term is when you cut a hole in the condom and blast away never to return.

Guy 1: Did you hear that girl's boyfriend got her a dick in a box for Christmas?
Guy 2: Ding Dong Ditch is what I'd give her.
Guy 1: Ding Dong Ditch the bitch.

by Eric Kazinsky May 15, 2016

Power Struggle Theory

Power Struggle Theory is the idea that a weakling is going to be most sensitive to a power struggle. This is akin to when a small dog barks wildly. This theory describes the behavior of young women who hunt for attention and enjoy keeping men at their fingertips. The vast majority of young women on sites such as Tinder and Facebook love to be in control of interactions with men and get off on the feeling of power they hold over them. Relinquishing such power is not in the interests of such a weakling, as then men would gain the upper hand in all areas. Such women usually have multiple “safe” beta males orbiting them. The woman gets a different type of stimulation and pleasure from each of the orbiters; also known as juggle play. A confident man does not need to engage in power struggles because he feels good about himself on his own. Most attractive young women realize the gig is up once the power struggle ends. They like to extend the struggle as long as possible to maintain their power and because of their fear a man will realize she brings less character to the table than he thought.

Guy 1: Why does she reply to only 30% of my messages? I thought women loved to get attention.
Guy 2: Not necessarily. Why do you think many women interpret your interest in them as weakness?
Guy: I don’t know. They don’t like muff munchers?
Guy 2: Power Struggle Theory in practice.

by Eric Kazinsky January 13, 2016

Trickle Down Beta Impact Theory

Trickle Down Beta Impact Theory is the theory that beta males just let their fellow betas get beaten up by other betas and it trickles downwards into a society of 99% beta males. When the trickling occurs, there is no way to stop it. Whereas when an upward alpha male surge occurs, feminists are quick to jump in and shut down the movement. The Trickle Down Beta Impact Theory explains the steady dropping of testosterone rates and increasing feminine male behavior in society.

Guy 1: Did you see that black thug beat up the white guy working at Applebee's while all of the whiteys stood around looking on?
Guy 2: That's what I call the Trickle Down Beta Impact Theory!

by Eric Kazinsky May 11, 2016

Soycialist

A man who chugged so much soy that his estrogen levels soared to the point that he thought personal ownership of anything was pointless and that wealth is bad.

Guy 1: Did you see that dude with the Vitasoy drink downtown?
Guy 2: Yup, that soycialist tried to tell me to redistribute my wealth to him. He should lay off the soy.

by Eric Kazinsky June 12, 2018

IBS

Short for intellectual belittling syndrome. The main symptom of this syndrome is using a hostile, unprovoked thought-terminating tactic to avoid a real issue at hand in a discussion. This syndrome (also known as IBS) causes usually hostile people to try to diminish others mentally in a variety of fallacious ways and describes a common self-refuting debating tactic. This usually involves discussing a topic and telling someone else (who is perfectly qualified to discuss the issue) they "won't understand it because it's too complicated." This occurs most frequently with respect to discussions about economics, politics, nutrition, and computer programming. Connected with this syndrome is having a chip on one's shoulder and a lack of understanding of the fact that the burden of proof lies on the speaker to justify extraordinary claims.

This term was supposedly invented by Jerry Seinfeld, explaining how his Jewish relatives would come over to his house when he was a kid and try to one-up him in every way possible. At the core of it, an IBS sufferer has deep-seated insecurity issues provoking and propelling their supposed superiority.

Guy 1: Why does Allan always message me out of the blue and criticize me? I don't get it. He opens any discussion as if I'm below him, won't understand what he's talking about, and am a total idiot. Guy 2: This is unfortunately the communication style of a low net worth IBS guy. My best advice is to avoid people like that as much as you can if you plan to keep your sanity. Some people can't imagine living without trying to overcompensate in every area of life.

by Eric Kazinsky May 30, 2014