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Chang Tan's definitions

snert

Somebody who repeatily "rapes" a game environment of all its fun and dignity, ruining the game for anyone else. Mostly found in RPGs, they are likely banning targets, unless they are really frickin crafty, in which they blame somebody else instead, and they get banned.
When that snert on Asherons Call said I stole its ultimate quiddity orb of infinite lightning although he is in no shape of a level to actually hold such a "about-to-be-nerfed" item, I was banned, forever. Stupid snerts.
by Chang Tan October 26, 2003
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pop music

The catagory with the fastest band deathrate ever achieved in music.
Backstreet boys got popular, then pow!
Spice Girls got popular, bickered among each other, sang on their own, then pow!
Britney Spears got popular, then pow! Shes a porno star among cyber-wienies!

This is the cycle of pop music. Don't be a pop artist, they'll love you, then they'll hate you.
by Chang Tan January 27, 2004
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megatokyo

The "I wish I was Japense fanclub". It features several main characters:

Piro - The webmaster, artist, and main character of the comic. He is portrayed as a innocent pansy nerd, with a kink for Japanese girls and a obsessive sock fetish. Thankfully, his wussiness has restrained him from several potential scenes of rape throughout the comic, thus keeping the material clean for all readers.

Largo - Stereotypical gamer and avid comptuer overclocker, babbles in nonsensical "l33tsp33k", and due to his constant binging, has incredible resistance to physical punishment, which aids him well in his quest to purge all of Japan of "zombies", possibly a fabrication of his manic America Versus Japan culture clashing.

"The Queen" - Archnemesis of Largo, she posesses formidable skills in gaming, rivaling the disillusioned yankee himself. Intrigued by Largo's stubborness to cling onto his assinine beliefs, much of her story involves a complex silent-romance between her and the unwary Largo.

Hayasaka-San - One of the first friends Piro makes in Japan, she works in a game shop downtown. She keeps to herself about her personal life, and fends off sexual predators with voracious ferocity.

Generic Schoolwhore - A teenager of 16, she too has a crush with Piro, and with the pressure of her two bimbo peers, is forced into a shakey relationship with the reclusive twigboy.
Piro - "Oh my god, I'm so stupid! I should have got her drunk and pinned her down to the floor at the bar and had my way with her. But nooo... I wussed out. Stupid! Stupid! STUPID! Time to drown my sorrows with another drawing of sad girls in snow..."

Largo - "OMGz! U teh fag0rt! I teh l33t mast0rz! Git off me l33t n3tw0rk n0de u teh n00b!"

"The Queen" - "Dark, blackness, consuming me, tearing me up from the inside, can't endure for much longer.... tendrils fingering my asshole.... my sanity is about to crack.... death, darkness, destruction...."

Hayasaka-San - "Get any closer to me and i'll break your other arm!"

Generic Schoolwhore - "Kawaii! Oh my god, your so cute! Cutey Cutey Cutey ^-^! Hey handsome, how about a appointment in my apartment at 1908 Hawasaka Avenue, i'll be dressing in that outfit you like.... meet me at 9:00 sharp, and dress SEXY!"
by Chang Tan February 26, 2005
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utopia

A society that is proposed by Carl Marx, promptly before the authories killed him. Basically the utopia is a perfect place where there is no rich and poor and everything is abundant, it comes from capitalism.
The Russians skipped the capatalism part, formed the Soviet Union, and killed anyone who opposed their "utopia".
by Chang Tan October 26, 2003
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tibia

A frustrating game that has made great advancements in graphics and GUI and control quality. Now avatars actually walk around instead of warping. However, the gameplay and newbie-friendlyness is at a all-time low.

Idiotic down-syndrome patients usually talk to shopkeepers, unable to say "bye" when they are idling, they idle in front of pathways to stores and bridges, causing much abuse in newbie island by laming everything with kill/corpse stealing. I never actually got to the mainland because of this. Nor do I want to, since the people populating Tibia's forums talk like illiterate "l33t" wannabes, just because they probably managed to install Linux. Who fucking cares, linux is free, which further makes it easier to install, and now they boast this shit on free-game forums.
Tibia player (rookguard):N00B! N00b! N00b! You suxx0rs! LOL!

Tibia abuser (rookguard:town): (to shopkeeper) Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi ! Why isnt he answering me! Hi Hi Hi Hi Hi !

Tibia forummember: You didn't get to mainland yet? Go buy a premium account and get there in 2 hours n00b! Hey look! This n00b wasn't smart enough to buy a premium account so he can play in mainland! N00bs! He suxx0rs to the maxx0rs! W00t! I'm fuggin l33t!

Tibia forummember # 2: Hey lets get him banned if he doesn't like our game!

Tibia forum member: yeah!
by Chang Tan December 30, 2003
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banana

Asian guy who hates his own race, his family, his culture, and especially himself.

He yearns for surgical treatments to change his eyelid shape, and uses dyes to change his skin and hair coloration. Blue eyed pupils and natural blond hair are widely desired, but futile in effort (Dr Mengele experimented with changing pupil coloration by injecting ink with fatal results).

His greatest dream is complete genetic modifcation, cleansing himself of his hereditary curse so that he may produce more children embracing wonderous western customs.

Note that the banana (preferred over the less macho Twinkie), would never touch or own anything Asian. For it he had control of his well-earned money (his family would often shake every cent out of him before he can spend it), he would buy domestic products: American made Hummer H1, Ford/Dodge/Chevy trucks (preferably Cummins/Duramax Diesel engine), and order rectangular pizza over the phone, with the sauces and toppings arranged in a way that it resembles the American flag.
Chang Tan - Western enthusiast, and a figure of anti-Asian traditions.
by Chang Tan July 28, 2005
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teletubbies

Baby gorillas, whom, because of their small and morbidly obese build, became perfect subjects for a top secret experiment dubbed, "teletubbies".

Kidnapped from their native habitat, they were strapped down hooting and screaming onto operation tables. Their stomachs were removed and replaced with a crude malfunctioning television set, which recieved its signals from a implanted attenna on the top of its head. Because the attenna's reciever must be outside of the body, a hole is drilled through the baby gorilla's brain, making a pathway to stick the electrical equipment through. Unfortunately, this only resulted in having the entire cast of teletubbies having the combined intelligence of tupperware.

To feed the disillusioned apes, a special diet consisting of purified ethanol (tubby toast), and lead paint oatmeal (tubby custard) to keep the seditious thoughts of the infants surpressed. A fake sun watches over them with a ensuringly peaceful baby's face on it to keep the tubbies close to their safety dome. When a tubby escapes, the sun makes a blood-curdling cry, calling upon the dome janitor, a robot vacuum cleaner named "snoo snoo" to hunt down and kill the escapee by devouring it with it's mighty vacuum, grinding the hapless tubby and using it's remains as fertilizer for the vast lush gardens surrounding the dome.

Occasionally when the time is just right, the tubbies may be able to recieve radio waves with their broken attennas, allowing them to eavesdrop on their human overseers, yet baffled by the simplest tasks we can do, such as showering or cooking an egg.
"Once upon a time in teletubby land, teletubbies... come to play!"
by Chang Tan September 1, 2004
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