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Alpino's definitions

death metal

What the Cookie Monster does at night, after Sesame Street closes.
Whenever the old lady bitches about "playing your death metal music in front of the kids" I just tell them "it's the Cookie Monster singing."
by Alpino October 16, 2008
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gat

holy shit she had a gat in her purse.... no one ever raped a .357
by Alpino October 28, 2008
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center of the universe

the vagina
men might think they control the world but women possess the center of the universe
by Alpino October 28, 2008
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AK

The best weapon on the planet, in the right.... or wrong hands. It takes trained or determined infantryman to use it properly... not a "soulja" gangbanger spraying it sideways and hitting their neighbor's three year old... not some clown haji insurgent that has seen too many Rambo movies and shoots from the hip.

Can be buried in mud for years and still kill.

Has killed more people with "real guns" than any other weapon.
The most dangerous thing in the world is a hungry peasant with an AK.
by Alpino October 28, 2008
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Army

A part of the US military that uses acronyms and knows how to spell, unlike their USMC brothers that think ARMY is an acronym for "ain't ready to be marines yet". When I tried it was ARTBMY. US ARMY actually means "Uncle Sam Ass Raped Me Yesterday"

- Have fought in every war for our nation, not guarded unruly sailors.

- Are capable of thinking, at least the Airborne, SF, Rangers. A very dangerous weapon indeed! The Marines react, which has its place.

- Are not a branch of the Navy

- The ARMY gives awards for "being"

- Wears black berets like Saddam Hussein did

- Gets things done without a cheerleader type PR... you know who does. The ARMY hires shitty advertising agencies.

- Admits to its mistakes
It's a War when the Army gets involved.
by Alpino October 28, 2008
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retard chimp strong

We all know chimps are much stronger than humans, and retards are much stronger than "normal" humans... can you imagine the strength of a retarded chimp? A new level of "going apeshit"
When the police arrived and tried to cuff him, he got retard chimp strong, kicked the two pepper spraying cops asses, and ran into the night.
by Alpino May 15, 2016
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Eye-talian

An Italian in Montana, Wyoming, & Texas I suppose.
Do you want Eye-talian dressing on your salad?
No, I want Italian dressing on my salad, after my dinner.
by Alpino October 28, 2020
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