61 definitions by Yopmail User
by Yopmail User November 19, 2022
Alice grimaced when Bob emasculated himself with his pants zipper at their son's school. His cock and balls fell right in the boy's mouth.
by Yopmail User July 1, 2023
Reporting live from Yopmail User News! A man and his child have committed suicide after Joe Biden ravaged the kid's asscrack! If you give a shit about your child's asscrack, don't let the Joepedo near it.
by Yopmail User November 6, 2022
This sex act requires that you abduct three little girls and strip them naked in your basement. You must then break their knees with a sledgehammer, toss the girls aside, create a mixture of laxatives and your bodily fluids (especially cum and vomit), and let it blend for ten minutes. During these ten minutes, you are to stand a few meters from your desired girl, charge towards her, ram your cock (you can use a spiked dildo, albeit not necessary) up her ass (cunts and mouths are acceptable), and repeat for each girl until the blending finishes. Feed one of the girls your concoction and, with a staple gun, connect the girls' mouths to each other's asses so that they form an endless human centipede. After some time, collect some of their shit and use it to spell out a phrase of your choice. Smear the shit on their faces afterwards and beat off on their backs and faces.
by Yopmail User August 28, 2023
If you, by some miracle, are actually thinking of watching this school shooting of a "movie," please dial the Suicide Hotline: 1-800-555-9999. Watching it is, to say the least, an incredibly painful way to fucking die. And to those of you who have watched it, I wish you'd known how much you'd be missed before then.
by Yopmail User April 10, 2023
To force-feed a kid some grass, make him chew the dog shit off your lawn while you penetrate them anally, strip him naked in your home, and try to suck his dick with a vacuum cleaner. If his dick is ripped off within five seconds, rape him again and fire a gun next to his ear until he goes deaf. Make him down every bottle of alcohol you have and penetrate him in his eye sockets as hard as possible. Finish the act off by shoving him in a toilet and throwing shit at him while yelling slurs and insults (not that he'll hear them). Make him eat the shit afterwards, ejaculate and vomit in his mouth and on his face, shove Diet Coke and Mentos up his ass, and have everything on camera.
by Yopmail User July 3, 2023
-This shit happens more than ten years after the fucking prequel.
-Humans invade Pandora.
-The dead guy named Miles Quaritch turns out to be blue and alive.
-Jake's kids get kidnapped and freed (Spider being an exception).
-Jake and his family move to the fucking ocean.
-Lo'ak (Jake's son) fights some dude and almost gets fucking eaten by a predator.
-A tulkun named Payakan saves him (he's ostracized because he fought with the dudes who killed his mother).
-Kiri has a seizure. She lives because muh plot armor.
-Quaritch massacres the fucking tulkuns. Their brains prevent aging.
-Jake and his family get trapped in a sunken vessel (Payakan attacks it and kills the crew earlier).
-Lo'ak, Tsireya (Metkayina princess), and Tuk (Jack's daughter) get captured and live.
-Neteyam (Jake's son) dies. The other kids live.
-Quaritch holds Kiri (Jake's daughter) hostage until Neytiri (Jake's wife) cuts Spider's chest with a knife.
-Spider saves Quaritch and fucking stays on Pandora.
-Jake and his family stay underwater.
-Humans invade Pandora.
-The dead guy named Miles Quaritch turns out to be blue and alive.
-Jake's kids get kidnapped and freed (Spider being an exception).
-Jake and his family move to the fucking ocean.
-Lo'ak (Jake's son) fights some dude and almost gets fucking eaten by a predator.
-A tulkun named Payakan saves him (he's ostracized because he fought with the dudes who killed his mother).
-Kiri has a seizure. She lives because muh plot armor.
-Quaritch massacres the fucking tulkuns. Their brains prevent aging.
-Jake and his family get trapped in a sunken vessel (Payakan attacks it and kills the crew earlier).
-Lo'ak, Tsireya (Metkayina princess), and Tuk (Jack's daughter) get captured and live.
-Neteyam (Jake's son) dies. The other kids live.
-Quaritch holds Kiri (Jake's daughter) hostage until Neytiri (Jake's wife) cuts Spider's chest with a knife.
-Spider saves Quaritch and fucking stays on Pandora.
-Jake and his family stay underwater.
by Yopmail User December 18, 2022